The Kingdom of Loathing
An Adventurer is You!
Old Announcements for 2014
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December 31
Happy New Year! The Winter Garden, January's Item-of-the-Month, is now available in Mr. Store.

Also it's a new PvP season!

Also we are slack-ass slackers, and the Items-of-the-Year will be released on January 14thish. Sorry about that.

January 06
With a poof and a ho, and a ho and a ho, Crimbo Town once again vanishes into the mountain mists.

January 07
A few new variations on the basic class avatars are now available to everyone in the Account menu.

January 14
The Bounty Hunter Hunter has found himself, in the most unexpected of places -- his own shack.

January 20
2014's Items-of-the-Year are now available in Mr. Store. Also, 2014 begins on January 20th. Who knows when it'll end!

January 31
February's Item-of-the-Month is now available in Mr. Store. Put a buddy on your back!

February 07
KoL's own Jick was a guest on the most recent episode (#144) of Idle Thumbs! Check it out!

February 14
The next Challenge Path, the Avatar of Sneaky Pete, has arrived. Everyone try and stay cool.

February 19
A big new chunk of stuff is here! Right here in Level 11 City! A new quest that provides an alternative to the pirates for reaching the Palindome.

New zones! New monsters! New items! New everything!

February 28
The Palindome has been replaced with a slightly different Palindome. Now with more wet rare paper art. Ew!

February 28
There's a new quest available for shirts and people who love shirts and people who don't know what shirts are. Shirts.

February 28
March's Item-of-the-Month, Sneaky Pete's leather jacket, is in style (and in Mr. Store) now.

February 28
It's an eleventh anniversary anti-spectacular! All this month, for the low low price of slightly higher than normal, get a cool new thing!

March 06
For people who don't already have it unlocked by level 6ish, there's a new quest for opening the Hidden Temple.

March 11
Mr. Card Game, a KoL board game by Evertide Games, is now available. You can find details in the Store of Loathing.

March 31
April's Item-of-the-Month is now available in Mr. Store.

April 08
If you haven't yet had enough of hearing Jick talk about video games, check out Episode 12 of the Red Pages Podcast.

April 18
Hey hey, cool cool artists! The 2015 KoL Calendar Contest has begun! Check it out here.

April 21
The Dice Tower has done a video review of Mr. Card Game. Check it out! here on YouTube.

April 29
If, like us, you just can't get enough Riff, check him out on the latest episode of the Abject Suffering podcast!

April 30
Experimental May's Experimental Item-of-the-Month is now available in Mr. Experimental Store.

May 14
It's a new challenge path! The boring summer one. You get 100 turns per day and can't get more. Slow and Steady!

May 14
Spookyraven Manor has been thoroughly revamped. Six new zones! And over 100 new items and a bunch of new quests.

May 19
The Black Forest got jiggleshifted. It's like getting shufflejuggled, but more... subtle.

May 24
A massive alien spaceship just crashed in the Big Mountains. It's madness -- space madness!

May 31
June's Item-of-the-Month is going to be a couple or three days late -- we need a bit more time to scrape the crud off of it.

June 02
June's Item-of-the-Month is no longer late. That's how that works, right? It's in Mr. Store now! It's a cool grill!

June 02
The Ancient Buried Pyramid has been Ancient Buried Revamped. It's only really a little bit revamped. You'll hardly notice.

June 09
Whitey's Grove has undergone some minor miscellaneous improvements.

June 12
It's... Interface Thursday? Your inventory now has a tab that shows recently-acquired items. You can change the number in the Options menu.

June 14
Sheesh! Welcome to the Kingdom, Redditors, and thank you to quwertie for opening up the floodgates!

June 15
Remember: One week from 35 minutes from the time of this posting, our second Twitch live development event will happen!

June 18
Issue 5 of the KoL Comic is now available in the Store of Loathing!

June 22
The Time-Twitching Tower will continue to Terrorize Town until later Tonight!

June 23
Congratulations to Mme_Defarge, who just completed her 1,000th ascension! Holy moly!

June 30
July's Item-of-the-Month will be a day or two late. But unlike Tom Cruise, it will be born BEFORE the Fourth of July.

July 02
July's Item-of-the-Month, then clan speakeasy, is now available in Mr. Store, if you know the password.

July 02
We're going to be doing some work at the data center Thursday morning that may result in brief periods of downtime.

July 15
The method by which Turtle Tamers tame turtles has been rejiggered and simplified. Also, many more turtles have been added.

July 22
KoL Con XI tickets are now available in the Store of Loathing. Get 'em while they're hot!

July 31
We aaaaalmost made it, but we need a little more time to put the finishing touches on August's Item-of-the-Month. Tune in tomorrow.

August 01
August's January's August's Item-of-the-Month, The Confiscator's Grimoire, is now available in Mr. Store.

August 01
Also, the iconic top menu has been replaced with a far more functional and user-configurable version of itself. Check it out!

August 14
Fall's extra-challenging Challenge Path, Heavy Rains, is available now. Just like on your wedding day!

August 18
Coming to KoL Con? Only one week left to pre-order your KoL Con XI shirt from the Store of Loathing.

August 23
Don't forget -- tomorrow at noon PDT we're doing the next live content development / world event on!

August 24
We just started streaming our new Roman Times event on Twitch! Come join us!

August 24
We've taken a first stab at making the game mobile-friendly. You will see it automatically on many devices. Alternatively, it can be activated (or deactivated) from the Options Menu. (Be gentle, this is totally a beta.)

August 31
September's Item-of-the-Month, Thor's Pliers, is... are now available in Mr. Store. Zzzzzzzzot!

August 31
Ahoy there, matey! PvP Season 15 has started and Swagger Jack has something new in his store. Yarrr!

September 19
The old Whitey's Grove quest has been replaced with something new! And less reliant on you having seen one particular movie!

September 25
There's a new sheriff in town, and that sheriff is an Odd Jobs Board, at which you can spend turns a bunch at a time when you're too busy to play normally.

September 26
Remember: The next live KoL development event will be happening tomorrow at noon PDT on TwitchTV.

September 29
The sixth and final issue of the KoL Comic is now available for sale in the Store of Loathing! Also, 2015 Calendars! Partake in our capitalist ways.

September 29
It's looking like October's Item-of-the-Month is going to be a couple of days late. It's so scary that it's hard to work on.

October 02
Mr. Skullhead is doing a Kickstarter for a trade paperback of the first 6 issues of the Comic of Loathing.

October 03
October's Spooky Item-of-the-Month is now available in Mr. Store. Visit scenic Conspiracy Island!

October 22
On Saturday Oct. 25th at noon MST, Riff will be streaming a 24h Persona 3 marathon for the Extra-Life charity. Come watch at!

October 31
November's Item-of-the-Month, the Fist Turkey, is now available in Mr. Store.

November 10
We are sad to announce that as of November 15, Mr. Skullhead will no longer be an employee of Asymmetric. See his announcement here.

November 12
It's a revamped skills interface! It's got features galore. It's available in all the old familiar places.

November 13
The Store of Loathing will be closing on December 1. Place your Christmas orders now, for this and all future Christmases.

We are investigating third-party merchandise options, but nothing materialized in time to avoid a gap. Stay tuned early next year.

November 14
The Winter challenge path, Picky, is now available wherever fine reincarnations are sold.

November 19
Almost forgot -- Jick was a guest on a recent episode of the Overthinking It podcast.

November 22
We are streaming a few hours of live Wild West development on Twitch TV right now.

November 30
December's Item-of-the-Month will be... one morning late. I expect it to be available mid-day tomorrow.

November 30
Happy December, everyone! Check your campground for an Advent surprise. (It's a calendar. Sorry to spoil the surprise.)

Also, a curious camp has sprung up, seemingly overnight, on Desert Beach. What could it portend?

Find out in a week.

December 01
General Store is now selling sneaky wrapping paper, which you can use to hide gifts for other players all over the Kingdom.

December 01
December's Item-of-the-Month, the Crimbo Shrub familiar, is now available in Mr. Store. Decorate it! It's festive!

December 02
To help pave the way for a slight restructuring of Mr. Store, sales of the Ms. Accessory will be discontinued in 5 days.

December 07
Mr. Store has a few more things, a few fewer things, and an option to set up a recurring subscription via Amazon.

December 07
The Crimbonium mining camp on Desert Beach is now bustling with Yuletide industry.

December 14
Crimbo Town has once again emerged from the frigid mists of the Big Mountains.

December 26
At rollover on December 31, a new version of the Naughty Sorceress' Tower quest will be rolled out. If you are in the middle of the old quest at that time, your progress will be reset to the bottom of the new tower. If you've finished the old one, you'll have finished the new one.

December 26
Owing to Jick's classic holiday tradition of biting off more Christmas fudge than he can realistically chew, 2015's Familiars of the Year will be pretty late to the party. Let's call... it Monday the 12th.

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