The Kingdom of Loathing
An Adventurer is You!
Trivial Updates and Changes
January 18, 2024 - Items that "will become less good after Crimbo is over" have now done so.
January 11, 2024 - In roughly 2 days, the deed to Oliver's Place will be leaving Mr. Store.
January 02, 2024 - Hobopolis consumables can now only be used once per day. Sorry. It was just getting out of hand.
January 02, 2024 - All Standard-legal free runaway items now work 100% of the time and use Everything Looks Green as a cooldown.
December 16, 2023 - The sleaze damage mechanic in the Bar at War has been made more equitable. Fairer. It now hits everybody once per combat at the beginning. Try to keep it clean in there.
December 16, 2023 - Fixed "Elf Warfare" and "Pirate Warfare" being wired up backwards. Elf Warfare should make you better at killing pirates and vice versa. Sorry about that. Internal wires crossed.
December 15, 2023 - Pirate and Elf war leaderboards have been added to the login page.
December 05, 2023 - The gear made from the hobo-in-sheep's-clothing wool has been made a lot more powerful. Nothing particularly speed relevant, just some nicer quality-of-life stuff.
October 16, 2023 - The Shore, Inc. Gift Shop is now a thing you click on, rather than a thing you choose from a menu in the zone.
September 19, 2023 - Are the august scepter skills too much awesome for you to handle? Click the handy dandy [disable] link to hide those skills until you click [enable]! Fun wow!
September 12, 2023 - You may now only equip one ceramic celsiturometer and one ceramic cerecloth belt at a time. More than that is really a fashion faux pas!
September 12, 2023 - Getting older, squinting at chat? Check out the new chat size options on the account page.
September 05, 2023 - CDMoyer apologizes, but the double-sided tape and cognac he accidentally included in the book of facts random item selection are no longer avaialable.
August 17, 2023 - Five existing monsters have a brand new item that they drop. Yay!
July 13, 2023 - An old friend has rolled into Market Square. Take a look.
June 27, 2023 - The fiberglass foil no longer works in skid row. And dinosaur modifiers no longer apply. For, you know, reasons.
June 01, 2023 - The sot will now give you a new place to go iif your current place becomes inaccessible.
May 14, 2023 - The shadow rifts have faded into the... darker shadows?
May 01, 2023 - There are now messages in the charpane if your character has one of the things that forces the next adventure to be a noncombat.
March 14, 2023 - Bosses you fight for Rufus will no longer consume an Adventure.
February 01, 2023 - The Nuclear Autumn path can no longer be dropped in the first three days of a run.
January 30, 2023 - You (your character) can now only enter the astral gash (ascend) once per in-game day (between two rollovers).
January 30, 2023 - Adventure absorption from monsters in the Grey You challenge path has been limited to 500 per day, to squash some degenerate path-dropping farming behavior.
January 04, 2023 - The monster resulting from improper use of the [glitch season reward name] is now limited to providing 1,111 stats from combat.
January 03, 2023 - The Cyrpt bosses now only account for the last 13 units of evil, so they take a little longer to show up.
December 26, 2022 - There was a bug that caused some players to miss the opportunity to fight the Crimbo boss. Visiting the main map should fix anybody in this situation. Sorry!
December 22, 2022 - Your workshed will now reset on ascensions. IotM workshed items should now auto-pull on ascension. You can can always change your workshed item once per day. (Which means using two items when you ascend. The first one and then change it.)
November 16, 2022 - Patrons of the location originally known as Oliver's Place will now be able to brawl three times each day without costing an adventure.
November 11, 2022 - In honor of Asymmetric’s new prohibition-era game, we’ve released a limited time item in Mr. Store - The deed to Oliver's Place.
October 18, 2022 - Heads up! The Party of 1895 will soon be ending. The Time-Twitching Tower will be just a memory after tomorrow's rollover. (About 36 hours from now.)
April 25, 2022 - The unbreakable umbrella will now let you ride the updraft in the heating vent in the castle in the clouds in the sky in the kindgom of loathing game in your browser in your computer in your home in your country.
January 10, 2022 - The miniature crystal ball now allows you to ponder it, viewing all applicable predictions that have been made. That said, a prediction coming true now moves you into a mirror dimension where any other predictions are no longer true.
January 10, 2022 - "+ Booze Drops from Monsters" now applies to cocktailcrafting ingredients. This is so that "+ Food Drops from Monsters" no longer thinks that it is so much cooler.
January 05, 2022 - The zones on the bottom floor of Spookyraven Manor are now considered to be underground by the entities that consider such things.
January 03, 2022 - Weird, Complicated, You Probably Don't Care Mechanics Warnings: The cold medicine cabinet now tracks the types of zones you visit after finishing a fight that takes a turn, not when you click a zone. Sorry, the few of you that figured out how to exploit the old way.
January 03, 2022 - The Lucky Lindy, Optimal Dog, and Sunday's Pillkeeper Pill now conform to our modern notions of luck.
December 31, 2021 - Oh also Cannonfire40 wants me to announce that the Demon Name adventures in the Spooky Forest and Haunted Bathroom are now unavailable until after whatever thing happens in there that people care about.
December 31, 2021 - Astral Energy Drinks have returned to the Deli Lama, and now interact with the aforementioned system.
December 31, 2021 - Clover adventures and Semirares have been consolidated into a single system. In related news, the Hermit has discovered a new species of clover with EVEN MORE LEAVES.
December 31, 2021 - Transcendent Olfaction no longer costs MP, no longer expires, and is limited to 3 casts per day.
December 31, 2021 - To make pull lists less of a foregone conclusion and create a more interesting decision space, we've made it so you can only pull one of a given item from Hagnk's each day.
December 27, 2021 - Transcendent Olfaction should no longer show up in your skills list if you already have the current monster olfacted. This does not presage anything ominous. Certainly it does not.
December 23, 2021 - With the thawing of the Site Alpha Primary Lab, the Kingdom's supply of inert grey goo rings has become significantly less inert.
December 18, 2021 - The Site Alpha team hit the nog machine with a wrench a few times, and it should now be working properly.
December 02, 2021 - Spleen items no longer show an often misleading quality rating, if they don't give adventures.
November 02, 2021 - The order of effects from the Daylight Shavings Helmet has been tweaked. (Sorry Spaders!) Also, Boris no longer gets stuck with one effect forever.
October 19, 2021 - Newer Vampire Vintner wine is now slightly more potent, older wine is now less potent. All wine gives 2 more turns of the appropriate effect.
August 21, 2021 - Look, it's a bookmobile in market square!
June 10, 2021 - The Museum in Seaside Town now has more up-to-date leaderboards and also some additional floors.
June 01, 2021 - Due to circumstances entirely under CDM's control, the Item-of-the-Month will be out tomorrow instead of today. He's very sorry about this.
December 15, 2020 - The subscription cocoa dispenser is now tradable. Once it changes hands, it will require a day of acclimation before it starts pumping out hot cocoa.
November 16, 2020 - The retro superhero cape in trench cape mode is now slightly cooler! Watch out, undead!
September 02, 2020 - There's been some minor construction on the downtown monorail platform.
September 01, 2020 - Winning an attack in hardcore PvP is now worth an extra swagger. Dominate the Season(ing) and get some Universal Seasoning!
August 15, 2020 - Rainbow pearl jewelry is now subject to Standard restrictions.
August 12, 2020 - The drop code for a hidden lathe item that was previously not hooked up is now hooked up. Sorry for the delayed hooking.
May 12, 2020 - Can't find your Guzzlr tablet? It's now an accessory, check the equipment tab in inventory.
May 12, 2020 - The drunken engineers at Guzzlr have upgraded their tablet firmware, which is now equippable as an accessory!
April 05, 2020 - Colossal free-range mushrooms can now be traded with other players.
February 18, 2020 - The replacement Council dialogue for Path of the Plumber is now correctly wired up.
February 15, 2020 - Paraffin pseudoaccordions can now be equipped by classes other than Accordion Thieves. Civilization is a cruel joke, and the rule of law is no more.
February 02, 2020 - 2019 Standard gear can now be bought in the customary way at the Armory and Leggery.
January 01, 2020 - Noncombat progress through the Friar zones is less janky now. If you're the kind of person who cared about this, you'll probably understand what this means.
January 01, 2020 - A couple of boozy new undead monsters have taken up residence in the Cyrpt, and a couple of fruity new bats have done likewise in the Bat Hole.
January 01, 2020 - Advanced Cocktailcrafting now summons one of each cocktail accessory instead of three random ones.
January 01, 2020 - The way milk of magnesium works has been changed. It's now a once-per-day flat boost of 5 turns to the next food you eat.
December 29, 2019 - Dolph Bossin's hat has been altered to be more of a gift and less of a secret lump of accidental coal.
December 19, 2019 - Human musk no longer takes an adventure the first three times you use it each day. Happy Crimbo!
December 15, 2019 - Do Not Open 'Til Crimbo boxes are now available at the Gift Shop in Bordertown.
September 25, 2019 - The formula for pocket professor skill uses per day has been tweaked to be more generous at low weight and less... obviously broken at mega weight.
August 20, 2019 - Bunches of updates and fixes yesterday, thanks Aenimus for the compilation:
June 05, 2019 - June's Item-of-the-Month is going to be a few more days delayed. ;( We're really sorry about this.
May 15, 2019 - Green Ops sodliers can now only drop one smoke bomb. Things were getting silly.
March 11, 2019 - The formulas in the Blech House encounter have been tweaked. Muscle is now more effective than before, and Moxie is less effective.
February 20, 2019 - Limited per day Dark Gyffte skills now say in their description how many more uses you have for the day.
January 31, 2019 - Do they know it's not Crimbo anymore? Yule hounds, I mean? Yes, they do now.
January 29, 2019 - An aftershock has similarly rearranged the Right Side of the Tracks. There is nothing to worry about.
January 29, 2019 - A minor earthquake has spread out the buildings on the Wrong Side of the Tracks a little bit. Do not be alarmed.
January 10, 2019 - Haunted hell ramen is now properly a pasta and saucy. In addition to haunted, hellish, noodley, and delicious.
January 08, 2019 - Turning the chore wheel in the Castle in the Clouds in the Sky no longer takes a turn, so people can stop doing the horrible dumb optimization trick it led to.
January 07, 2019 - 2018's Standard gear is now available in The Armory and Leggery if you have the proper currency.
January 07, 2019 - A dictionary can now be found in the library, making the Baron's quest finishable again. The one in Spookyraven Manor, not the one across from the Sleazy Back Alley.
January 04, 2019 - The grinder interface now reports how many units each item will yield.
January 02, 2019 - Thanks to an generous endowment from the Loathing Diamond Society, the museum was able to build a fifth floor to display the growing collection of standard ascension annual displays.
January 01, 2019 - The Avatar of Sneaky Pete can't be dropped during the first three days. For reasons. The 9 of you that were going to do that this year, sorry.
December 31, 2018 - The abridged dictionary has been removed from Barrrtleby's Barrrgain Books. We'll figure out somewhere harmless to stuff it later.
December 31, 2018 - The Talisman o' Nam can no longer be obtained from the pirates. Sorry. It's time.
December 31, 2018 - A couple of important quest monsters can no longer be copied. Nerf nerf nerf.
December 31, 2018 - Some very old potions have been converted to spleen items. Look forward to more of this kind of thing in the coming weeks.
December 28, 2018 - Fixed an issue with the perfectly balanced antler where instead of doing what it was supposed to do, it did nothing at all.
October 09, 2018 - The mime army challenge coin now has a high level requirement so that you aren't tempted to use it immediately on a new Ascension.
September 20, 2018 - You can now walk away from the intro choice in the Neverending Party if you want, like if you accidentally show up wearing the wrong shirt or something.
August 21, 2018 - Finished a Disguises Delimit run? Check your inventory for an exciting thwaitgold item. Also, your account avatar page for new feature.
August 17, 2018 - Your shadow will no longer ever wear a protest mask. Future trivial updates are required to be about something other than protest masks.
August 15, 2018 - You can now properly swap masks with monsters wearing the protest mask, if you want to do that for some reason.
June 13, 2018 - It's Tuesday somewhere. A handful of monsters drop new spleen items. And a handful more will soon.
June 01, 2018 - June's Item-of-the-Month, the SongBoom BoomBox, is now available in Mr. Store. Rock Out!
March 27, 2018 - Breaking news: thwaitgold is now Thwaitgold in the two most recent statues. Also, something about a monorail.
January 20, 2018 - The "things I can use" inventory filter now understands the new rules regarding level 13+ items and hardcore/ronin.
January 20, 2018 - Hi Meins now have a level requirement of 12. Yay!
January 14, 2018 - That thing about PvP fights reseting when you ascend instead of breaking your stone, forget you ever saw that trivial. ;)
January 03, 2018 - PvP Fights remaining now reset to 10 when you ascend, instead of when you break your stone. Congrats, premature PvP consumable ingesters.
January 02, 2018 - That leftover cheer? Those spare warehouse keys? Maybe take a look at them in your inventory. (wink, wink)
January 01, 2018 - In celebration of Slightly Later in the Afternoon on International Nerf Day, spleen items that give Adventures are no longer a thing in Ronin or Hardcore, via various tweaks and twerks.
January 01, 2018 - In celebration of International Nerf Day, the amount of Meat that can be earned from fights that don't take an Adventure has been capped.
December 16, 2017 - Tammy's Elves have updated their policies and procedures to ensure a steadier letter supply chain.
December 04, 2017 - Tantalize/Tease/Torment your friends! Send a gift in a DNOTC Box today!
December 01, 2017 - An Advent Calendar has, unsurprisingly, appeared in your campground. Merry Crimbo.
November 26, 2017 - An obscure thing where the monstername predicate in combat macros behaves erratically may be less buggy.
November 08, 2017 - Optimal Monsters no longer occur outside HC or Ronin, even while on the OCRS path. For reasons.
October 10, 2017 - You may or may not have new lines in your accomplishments. It depends on your lifetime basementing and monorail building.
October 03, 2017 - Organized resistance to the monorail is heating up. Those darned penguins.
September 29, 2017 - There is now a /wish chat command for genie bottle owners. Also, due to popular request, the requirements for the clown door are now telegraphed more clearly.
September 27, 2017 - Pocket wish and counterfeit city are now content unlockers in the mall search, Huge pumpkin carving works again, Profile Websites can now be https://, The order you add effects should no longer matter for things like The Fire Inside.
September 26, 2017 - Lyle, the Traveling Infrastructure Specialist at LIMP Industries on the Right Side of the Tracks, has more for you to do!
September 19, 2017 - Do you want to dominate the Drunkest or Most Hung-Over leaderboard? Now's your chance, they are no longer filled with people that aren't drunk or hung-over!
September 19, 2017 - The Florist Friar should now show up properly in the customized top menu. Also, buying a Bus Pass should cause your top menu to update. Failing to drink at the speakeasy will no longer count against your daily limit. Selecting cafe food or brewery booze as your favorite will no longer sometimes show the wrong thing.
September 16, 2017 - First Post shirt has been restocked on the proper shelf in the meme shop. Low-Light Operations Frame finally works on the mini-crimbot. Worm Wood monsters no longer die instantly when macrometerorified. Legendary Regalia of the Pasta Master has a fancy new outfit bonus that actually does something. Recent paths now show up in the sig generator. Summon Carrot no longer wastes MP when trying to cast multiple times. Love bug currency messages will no longer occasionally run in to the previous message. Wearing porcelain plus-fours will no longer obscure the name of your totem when buffing. Planet Xi green messages should now be clickable.
September 15, 2017 - Grab a Cold One no longer wastes MP if you try and multi-cast it. Summon Annoyance no longer requires having 10 swagger when it costs fewer. Summon Annoyance now shows the cost in the description. Crimbot is now a robot for the warbear foil hat. Losing the clipper when finishing the Conspiracy Island will no longer leave you with phanton clippers. Capitalized a pronoun in a z-rex message! Everything Looks Yellow from failing to Disintegrate will now go away at rollover. You can now get the breastplate in the airship after seeing the introduction. 193 potions are now multi-usable.
September 13, 2017 - Sweet Synthesis can now be done in batches! The Inventory Filter (enabled in Options) is now more betterful. Happy Wednesday.
August 22, 2017 - More Live. Ascend. Repeat. tweaks: Pirate insults, several candy sources, lovebugs, 8-bit Weinerdog Pixels, and wormriding manual pages should now be predictable.
August 18, 2017 - Living, Ascending, and Repeating? Semirares, blasting soda & vinegar drops, and macrometeorites should now be more... predictable.
June 12, 2017 - Ruin your fun now! Purchase Lazenby's Life Lessons in Mr. Store to shortcut the process of growing social capital in LtA runs. No Judgement.
May 21, 2017 - License to Adventure: Did you hear? Minions drop meat! Henchman drop stuff. Villains drop spoils. Someone in the world has a hint for you! O'Toole will improve his booze delivery! Yay!
March 14, 2017 - Do you own Monster Manuel and wish you could see already collected factoids after combat? Head to Options->Combat and enable endless factoids!
March 01, 2017 - Are you a gelatinous noob? Great, you can now make pick-pocket your auto-attack. If that's a thing you wanted to do. Neat-o!
February 06, 2017 - The stores of disabled players should once again not show up in mall searches.
February 06, 2017 - The Raffle House in Bordertown now shows how many tickets each winner purchased. To you, I mean. It always showed us.
January 24, 2017 - 2016's Standard gear sets are now available in the Armory and Leggery (if you have the proper currency to buy them).
January 23, 2017 - Top Bung, Liver, Nipple, Hat, Boot and other Chakra Cleaners can now view their exploits in the museum.
January 23, 2017 - The "Phone Booth" is now upstairs in the VIP Lounge, ghost dog chow is now multi-usable, and the Time-Spinner description tells how much sand remains.
January 23, 2017 - Non-Accordion Thieves can now cast buffs with the aerogel accordion. Also, you can now type numbers in the Time Prank form.
January 06, 2017 - Four new possible "Other Accomplishments!" Yay!
January 04, 2017 - A missing step in the Quest Tracker for the Level 11 quest is now not missing anymore. I wouldn't say it's missing, Bob.
January 01, 2017 - Let's do the time warp again! Also, take off your pants as though rollover tonight is New Year's Eve!
December 14, 2016 - Gingerbread vigilantes were accidentally attacking innocent citizens. They are now correctly only attacking loathsome criminals.
December 13, 2016 - A (currently blank) leaderboard has been put up in Crimbo Town. What does it portend?
December 05, 2016 - Time pranks and rubber spiders and such no longer occur in Gingerbread City zones.
November 07, 2016 - Hey PvPers: lava cake, standard-issue cupcakes and ultra-deluxe cupcakes are now cake. Mineapples and pixel lemons are now fruit. Yay!
November 04, 2016 - It looks like Dr. Stuart is working on a fissure-close-o-tron in his tent. Stay tuned for further updates.
October 28, 2016 - CheeseCookie in /hardcore has reported fighting an Eldritch Tentacle somewhere in the Kingdom. Strange.
October 03, 2016 - Sorry about the unexpected extra-long rollover last night! The hardware issues responsible have been sacked.
October 01, 2016 - The KoL Con 13 snowglobe is now pulled automatically from Hagnk's in a hardcore run. Thanks, Twitch viewers, for convincing us!
September 19, 2016 - Sets of potions with mutually-exclusive effects should no longer stop you from using the same one twice in a row.
September 19, 2016 - The effects you get from records you buy in your fallout shelter are now shruggable.
September 01, 2016 - You know that thing where the same prank played more than 5 times in a day isn't funny? Well, it now applies to time pranks.
August 27, 2016 - A few radiation-infused bugs in the Nuclear Autumn Challenge Path have been zapped by orbital laser.
August 23, 2016 - Hardcore Nuclear Autumn runs are now (and retroactively) twice as effective for the progress of your future fallout shelters.
August 23, 2016 - Non-Mutant Nuclear Autumn monsters are no longer also mutated to be more powerful. (That's a sentence?)
August 04, 2016 - Today Jick learned that censurious and censorious are two different words. Beware the gorvunculus.
August 04, 2016 - If you have Individual Accessory Slot Links and the right-click menu enabled, you'll now get slot links in right-click menu.
August 03, 2016 - Autoattack no longer triggers against the special protonic accelerator ghosts. Also the Mer-kin specter now counts as a ghost. Boo!
July 26, 2016 - Because yesterday's update might make the way booze works more confusing, maximum drunkenness is now displayed 1 lower than before.
July 08, 2016 - Source Terminal DIAGRAM chips now actually do what you installed them for instead of nothing (which is what they were doing before)
June 29, 2016 - You can now use Duplicate the intended 5 times while in The Source without using auto-attack.
June 08, 2016 - Overheated is no longer considered a strictly negative effect. Sorry. It was ridiculous in a way that wasn't very fun.
June 07, 2016 - Disco Nap + Turbo (from the Source Terminal) is no longer good for 1000MP every fight. Sorry.
June 03, 2016 - The Snojo, Witchess Set, and LT&T Office are now correctly locked out in Bad Moon runs.
May 19, 2016 - Source Agents have been upgraded to no longer assume all women are married.
May 18, 2016 - We've experimentally enabled zooming in the mobile interface. If we get more complaints than gratitude, we might undo this.
May 16, 2016 - The Source skills that stagger Agents now say that in their descriptions.
May 16, 2016 - Certain huge stat gains from recent Items-of-the-Month no longer work for users of the Source.
May 15, 2016 - ELDRITCH HORRORs (via the intergnat) are now more likely to drop scrolls. (Because randomly dropping a candle first no longer prevents scrolls for the day.)
May 15, 2016 - By popular request, the fights where SPOILER happens in The Source no longer takes a turn.
May 03, 2016 - Sorry, the intergnat no longer works a bunch of places if probably shouldn't, like while being batfellow.
April 06, 2016 - The Other Accomplishments page of your quest log now reports your Royalty, if you have any Royalty.
April 06, 2016 - Chewable paper can now be pulled from Hagnk's for free.
April 05, 2016 - Let's all take a moment to reflect on the 2015 Standard Season, and visit the museum's third floor. Sorry for the delay!
March 31, 2016 - All three porkstone-handled-sixguns should now have special effects when used in combat.
March 30, 2016 - The stories you get on A-Boo peak should now be less always-the-same.
March 30, 2016 - Peppermint Tailings from Crimbo 2014 are now tradable.
March 03, 2016 - Better late than never, you can trade Uncle Bucks for AWOL skill point in Mr. Store. (ps. You can also just play a bunch for fun) ;)
February 29, 2016 - Long Con, the Snake Oiler skill, is now more powerful. (KoL Science Nerds: it now overrides the queue like Olfaction)
February 22, 2016 - A set of convenient links to all of the Year-in-Review podcasts I can find has been added to
February 22, 2016 - AWOL (and other special) classes can now use Batfellow comics and Western Slang Volumes are now free pulls.
February 22, 2016 - In AWOL, Cowrruption no longer limits the stats of Cow Punchers and can be consumed with the Absorb Cowrruption skill.
February 19, 2016 - Persistent Batfellow readers (completing 20+ adventures) now receive a bonus comic on Mondays -- Darkness and Brooding, Batfellow
February 18, 2016 - Going forward, completing an AWOL ascension in hardcore will give you two skill points in future runs.
February 16, 2016 - A forgotten Snake Oiler patent medicine recipe has been discovered (marked public.) Sorry.
February 07, 2016 - The LT&T office should no longer offer the same quest twice in a row. This might take one more quest to kick in 'cause of where the logic lives.
February 03, 2016 - A bunch of Meatpasting recipes that were supposed to exist in the LT&T content now actually do exist.
January 06, 2016 - The red and green face paint from Crimbo are now free pulls.
January 06, 2016 - The Frost Bite skill now deals the physical damage it was supposed to deal instead of the hot damage it wasn't.
December 16, 2015 - The Quest Tracker now has a link to view your overall progress in the Crimbo event.
December 10, 2015 - Sorry about the Advent mixup. If you go back to your campsite, section 11 will unpunch itself so you can get your treat. -Jick
December 02, 2015 - Do-Not-Open-Til-Crimbo boxes are now available in the Gift Shop in Bordertown.
December 01, 2015 - There's now a link to a gallery of players' abstract art in the museum. We are obviously going to need some... policies.
October 28, 2015 - Electric Kool-Aid and bottles of Bloodweiser are now available for a premium price at the Terrified Eagle Inn in Dreadsylvania.
October 07, 2015 - All zones have been updated to have stat recommendations. This is important for turtles and stuff.
October 06, 2015 - The Hallowiener Dog no longer gives you Muscle, Muscle and Muscle when it gives stats. It now gives Moxie, Moxie and Moxie.
October 06, 2015 - You can now ask the Barrel god to stop giving you so many gosh-darned barrels already.
October 05, 2015 - A new animal has been added to the Crown of Ed. Congratulations to Clopedion for solving HotStuff's fiendish cartouche puzzle!
September 29, 2015 - Fixed some dumb bugs with the helmet and torch in the Spelunking minigame.
August 16, 2015 - Hair of the Fish now only counts previous-day drunkenness up to 15 if you're in Ronin or Hardcore when you use it.
August 07, 2015 - The painting in Chateau Mantegna can now be interacted with while drunk. The management requests... appropriate interactions only.
August 07, 2015 - The Deck of Every Card can now be used while falling-down drunk. The player assumes all risk associated with drunk drawing.
August 06, 2015 - The second floor of the disco should no longer light your tongue on fire, doo doo doo doo doo.
August 06, 2015 - You no longer have to count to three in your head when using fingernail clippers in Dr. Weirdeaux's mansion.
July 14, 2015 - The wok lobster should now be cookable for people for whom it randomly wasn't cookable before. Wokka wokka.
July 14, 2015 - Saucemaven has been made less effective. Sorry. I messed up when I made it. It was just too good. -XOXO, Jick
July 08, 2015 - Pixel coins are now multi-usable.
July 05, 2015 - Deciding not to cheat at cards no longer takes an Adventure. Non-cheaters never DON'T prosper.
July 02, 2015 - Delicious salad can now be used in any path from now until the end of the time. It is evergreen. It is glorious. All hail delicious salad.
June 16, 2015 - Floaty rock necklaces can now be untinkered.
June 10, 2015 - The crappy waiter disguise from the Copperhead Club now gives you 5 turns of crappy disguise instead of 1.
June 01, 2015 - Players in One Crazy Random Summer runs can now vacation at the bottom of the ocean. Thanks, Ieoh Ming!
June 01, 2015 - The keys that the junksprites in the old landfill drop will now respond to +item effects and familiars.
May 29, 2015 - Annoying One Crazy Random Summer monsters now get less annoying over time.
May 26, 2015 - The mouseover text on the One Crazy Random Summer icon in your ascension history now includes that run's Fun score.
May 19, 2015 - One Crazy Random Summer monsters can now be wet, hot and/or American.
May 19, 2015 - Untouchable monsters in One Crazy Random Summer are now slightly less obnoxious.
May 18, 2015 - The museum leaderboards for One Crazy Random Summer now do all the things they're supposed to do.
May 07, 2015 - Mayoflex no longer adds an Adventure to foods that give 0 Adventures. Sorry. It was causing too many goofy edge-case problems.
May 06, 2015 - The bear verb orgy mini will now only count one time per ascension and the mobile hamburger menu now links to crafting. Unrelated updates.
April 22, 2015 - Doc's herbs should stop dropping once you've finished his quest now. If you've got extras, go say hello to Doc and they'll vanish.
April 10, 2015 - Evil eyes can now be multi-used, thanks to our good friend the famed architect I. M. Pei.
April 08, 2015 - It is possible that swamp honey actually does something now.
April 07, 2015 - The first encounter at the Copperhead Club now allows you to leave before talking to Shen.
April 04, 2015 - Gaaaaaah. I fixed the idiotic bug that was making the garbage sticker give 100x as much Meat as intended. I am the dumbest.
April 03, 2015 - You can now temporarily disable Lovebugs, if you want to do that for some reason. Options -> Combat is where it's at.
April 02, 2015 - The game's most glaring problem has been fixed: The Talisman o' Nam is now called the Talisman o' Namsilat.
March 31, 2015 - The store link on the main map for Oyster Egg Day is no longer stupid and broken and dumb.
March 11, 2015 - Are you ready to get mild? Ed the Undying's "Mild Curse" skill can now be marked permanent.
March 03, 2015 - Ed's crown now makes you look like Ed even if you aren't Ed.
February 26, 2015 - Mr. Store now lets you pull Uncle Bucks out of storage the way you can with Mr. Accessories.
February 23, 2015 - Leveling up as Ed now unlocks servant imbumentations when you run out of skills to buy and initial skills/ed points are now an ascension history mouseover.
February 20, 2015 - In further nerfs - Ed can no longer use BRICKOs or enter clan dungeons. Also, there's a questlog and tracker for his epilogue quest.
February 19, 2015 - CDM has been nerfing Ed all day. You can't lash/pickpocket/whatnot over and over and mutagen spray no longer works multiple times.
February 11, 2015 - Spooky wads, watered-down red minotaurs, and ectoplasmic pastes have been returned to their pre-weekend states.
February 09, 2015 - The Armory and Leggery just got a new shipment of utensils for all the wizardy types.
February 08, 2015 - That thing that became true of HP restoring items earlier today is now true of MP restoring items too. It's Busywork Sunday.
February 08, 2015 - Items that restore HP now show how much they restore in their descriptions. Except the ones I inevitably forgot about.
February 06, 2015 - Uncle P's, the Armory and Leggery, the Meatsmith and the Knob Dispensary have been migrated to the new store interface.
February 06, 2015 - A secret bug has been fixed in the Spelunking minigame. Shhhhhh.
February 04, 2015 - The recent uncharacteristic generosity of the Great Turtle Spirits was the result of a bug, and it has been fixed.
February 04, 2015 - Those darn water striders should no longer stand between you and the oasis.
January 30, 2015 - The Red Zeppelin ticket can now be purchased with Meat if Meat is what you have instead of diamonds.
January 21, 2015 - You no longer need to go to the pirate ship to use the volcano island map. This means the pirates are not important anymore.
January 20, 2015 - There is now a third option for the desk slot in Chateau Mantegna. Get fancy!
January 19, 2015 - There are now some trophies associated with the Familiar-of-the-Year Spelunking stuff.
January 17, 2015 - The Ascension leaderboards now show only the best run from a given player on a given board.
January 17, 2015 - Bad Moon runs are now listed as such on the Recent Ascensions list.
January 16, 2015 - For a reason that makes a TON of sense, people on Bees Hate You runs are no longer afraid of beehives. Or electric boning knives.
January 16, 2015 - You should now be able to spelunk even spelunking makes you drunk. Also if using the book leaves you with zero adventures.
January 15, 2015 - Rapid prototyping can now be done with 0 turns left; Frank no longer resets your ignore list; Recalling Skills has been recalled.
January 13, 2015 - When I said the Familiars of the Year would be out on the 12th I obviously meant the 14th. -Jick
January 06, 2015 - A handful of potions have been removed from the juice bar at the Chateau. Sorry, James (and all other spaders)!
January 02, 2015 - Jarlsberg should get his proper final fight now, Dad is now a boss for PvP murdering, Fisting the Wall of Skin is now easier, ice steins now count for PvP, and so on.
January 02, 2015 - The Protector Spurt is now a lot more bossy. (In terms of his murder giving you PvP benefit.)
January 02, 2015 - Bugbear Invasion runs should no longer make you do the new tower after you finish the mothership. I think. Maybe.
January 01, 2015 - "Most Ascensions" and "Most Hardcore Ascensions" leaderboards can now be found on the Statistics plinth in the Museum. Plinth.
January 01, 2015 - A detailed list of all recent ascensions is now available in the Museum.
January 01, 2015 - Resting in Chateau Pesci should now properly remove Beaten-Up.
January 01, 2015 - If you're in a position where you need to find the Foodie Giant's room, the Foodie Giant's room is now much easier to find.
January 01, 2015 - CDM checked some boxes, so a few seasons 17 PvP minis show their split hardcore/softcore scores now.
December 30, 2014 - Crimbo Town will be fading back into the mists at rollover on Wednesday night. Bot 'em while you got 'em.
December 22, 2014 - Through the miracle of technology, high schoolers are now able to swim.
December 20, 2014 - The entirety of the Fully Automated Crimbo Factory is now available, and the vending machine is fully stocked. Happy Crimbo!
December 19, 2014 - The place where you turn in the underwear and magazines and stuff now tells you how many Crimbo Credits you've got on hand.
December 19, 2014 - Forgot to mention this yesterday -- you now get a little notice when monsters critically hit.
December 18, 2014 - Some new bits are available in the Crimbo Town vending machine! Happy Crimbo!
December 17, 2014 - All of the stuff that should've been taken care of during last night's half-assed content rollout should now be fully assed.
December 15, 2014 - The staph of homophones no longer screws up the Crimbot factory. Flasks of mining oil, tainted or untainted, are now multi-usable.
December 10, 2014 - Nog lovers rejoice, gamma nog is now a viable PvP beverage. (Sorry, that one angry person who took one for the team.)
December 10, 2014 - The shambling, idiot corpses of random people are no longer the most cunning pickpockets in the world.
December 09, 2014 - The Crimbonium Mining Camp's AI has determined that it can operate more efficiently by using a cheaper joint-lubricating oil.
December 09, 2014 - There is now a link to the subscription management page on the account menu. The Account section of the account menu. Account.
December 09, 2014 - The Crackpot Mystic is no longer secretive about the things you don't have enough pixels for him to make.
December 09, 2014 - Lord Spookyraven has been retroactively given the ability to have jilted more than one mistress per day.
December 08, 2014 - In preparation for the upcoming NS Tower revamp, the Wand of Nagamar has been made into a quiet stem. I mean a quest item.
December 05, 2014 - Oh right, trivials. The Big Mountains got Bigger and Mountainser yesterday.
December 04, 2014 - We can now post trivial updates without auto-tweeting them. Expect more trivial updates.
December 04, 2014 - PVPers: If you are using Modern (Tabbed) Chat, Huggler Radio will now get a special tab, all its own. (This can be toggled by using the radio.)
November 30, 2014 - The descriptions of monsters with stealable accordions now mention their accordions, like they should have for a year. Grrrr.
November 19, 2014 - Picky tweezers now do a thing.
November 09, 2014 - Transmissions from planet Xi now always give the same items the first two times you use them.
November 07, 2014 - The Naughty Sorceress and her pets have had a... let's call it a falling out.
October 30, 2014 - Witches can no longer turn cats into pigs.
September 16, 2014 - There were some things associated with the Con item that weren't pushed to the live servers, but now They Are Live.
September 01, 2014 - Sugar sheets now use the standard shop interface, which means you can use /buy to make those items now, Sugar.
September 01, 2014 - The Council's Adventurer Signal is now visible from space. Did you know that when you look at the Main Map you're in space?
September 01, 2014 - Various parts of Seaside Town have been shuffled around in an effort to make room for various other parts of Seaside Town.
August 19, 2014 - There was an item missing from the freshwater fishbone crafting thing. That item is no longer missing.
August 18, 2014 - The way the Smile of Mr. Accessory skill works on the backend has changed. Please report any problems you encounter with it.
August 18, 2014 - Rainbow Gravitation has been given back the friendly error output I took away from it like a big mean jerk. Also now costs 0 MP.
August 16, 2014 - Thunder and Lightning and Rain power readouts now show up in the compact character pane.
August 16, 2014 - Similarly, the damp version of the Goblin King now drops the lab key if you don't already have it.
August 16, 2014 - You've been crying, so I've been fixing, and the Rain King correctly drops Instant Karma now.
August 14, 2014 - The turn-in process and rewards for the Bat Hole and Cyrpt quests have been simplified. The badass belt remains badass.
August 06, 2014 - A bunch of icon options have been added to the top menu by player request. You might have to reload the frame to see them.
August 06, 2014 - Owing to hobo regulatory capture, boxcar turtles are now once again permitted to ride the rails of Hobopolis.
August 05, 2014 - Fixed some missing stat recommendations that were causing some zones to contain wimpier turtles than intended.
August 04, 2014 - The familiar name manager now supports the new default names. Know that I do not approve of this specific use of this feature.
August 04, 2014 - The default familiar name generator has been given a fresh coat of arms. Paint arms. Paint.
July 22, 2014 - Monster Manuel now grants access to over thirty new additional avatar-changing potions.
June 27, 2014 - Food and booze items that give PvP fights instead of Adventures now say so in their descriptions.
June 24, 2014 - The helix fossil now has an fiction-appropriate name generator attached to it. Sample names: ;CDDDDDDDD WWWWWWWWWW M?;;:-G-,,
June 18, 2014 - To avoid goofiness caused by the horrors of war, the Frattlesnake is no longer in the pool of targets for Shen Copperheads quests.
June 15, 2014 - New players now get a one-time-only "get out of drunk free card" the first time they overdrink. It isn't an actual card.
June 13, 2014 - Fixed a problem that was making hatrack / scarecrow sombrero messages not show up, and also wrote a name generator for scarecrows.
June 12, 2014 - Snakehead charrrms now combine via [use] instead of Meat Paste, thus making it possible once again to do that via chat command.
June 09, 2014 - Starting the level 12 quest no longer requires you to have gotten into the Palindome.
June 05, 2014 - Giving a familiar a blank name will now re-trigger the thing that randomly generated its name in the first place.
June 02, 2014 - The maximum number of stat points provided by a Sombrero-type familiar has changed from 100 to 230, and the minimum from 0 to 1.
June 01, 2014 - The galoshes made by the blackberry cobbler can now be worn by people who are less cool. Specifically, 15 less cool.
May 30, 2014 - The other accomplishments section of the Quest Log now tells you how good you are at playing pool, unless you are zero good at it.
May 19, 2014 - Entangling Noodles is now castable once per fight even if you're not a Pastamancer.
May 18, 2014 - You can now Slowly and Steadily drown in The Sea if you want.
May 16, 2014 - Our accidentally hot kitchen drawers are now correctly stinky. If you can't stand the stench, get out of our drawers.
May 16, 2014 - We had a staff meeting and decided to make it so the Staff of Fats is now an actual staff.
May 16, 2014 - Henry "Dakota" Fanning is now sending people on goose chases that are slightly less wild while unlocking the Hidden Temple.
May 15, 2014 - Volleyball-type and Sombrero-type familiars have been improved in various ways, and now display how many extra stats they give.
May 15, 2014 - Ignoring books in the Spookyraven library now makes them stay away for 10 Adventures. Reading is for dorks!
May 15, 2014 - The Staff of the Electric Range can now be jiggled. We apologize for the inexcusable period of non-jigglability.
May 07, 2014 - You can now take a break from taking a break in the Diner. Taking a break doesn't take an Adventure, but it does take a break.
May 02, 2014 - Spring Break Beach quests should correctly show up in the Quest Log now.
April 06, 2014 - By popular demand from like 8 years ago, display case shelves can now be re-ordered.
March 31, 2014 - Added support for Australian browsers.
March 24, 2014 - Fixed a bug that made elemental tuning on Weapon of the Pastalord weird. Probably un-fixed a previous bug. Only time will tell.
March 18, 2014 - The quest tracker should now be less dumb about hiding things.
March 10, 2014 - Sonofa Beach now periodically guarantees a lobsterfrogman encounter, hopefully preventing terminal cases of bad luck.
March 07, 2014 - The workoutfit wasn't quite working out, so we exercised our right to change the outfit bonus.
March 03, 2014 - The in-fight Monster Manuel icon should no longer be... tabbable-to? It's tab-skipped now. You can hit tab and it won't go to it.
March 02, 2014 - A couple of things that were broken by the Disco Bandit revamp are now no longer broken. Disco never dies, baby.
February 25, 2014 - The Kingdom's mosquitos got significantly more powerful today. They're probably still not very powerful, though.
February 20, 2014 - The Blue Oyster Cultist now correctly drops an item he should have been dropping yesterday.
February 17, 2014 - The end boss of an Age of Sneaky Pete run should now properly drop Instant Karma.
February 17, 2014 - Funny story: Pixel orbs, corrupted startdust and bottles of Blank-Out can now be used only once per day each. Okay, I lied about it being funny.
February 12, 2014 - Clan forums now have a quick reply box, combat macros have a snarfblat predicate, and chat macros now support one level of macros in macros.
February 05, 2014 - The Hidden Hospital part of the level 11 quest will now always eventually resolve, no matter how bad you are at playing doctor.
January 21, 2014 - There is now a "New Stuff" search category in the Mall, for "stuff" that is "new". Thanks, Uncle CDMoyer!
January 14, 2014 - Heads up -- today would be a bad day to leave BHH bounties unfinished at rollover.
January 13, 2014 - Right-clicking familiars in your terrarium now produces a list of equipment to equip in their equipment slot. Go ahead, try it.
January 07, 2014 - Running away from a fight now causes you to drop any Meat you gained during that fight.
January 05, 2014 - The mists in the big mountain are gathering again, and we expect them to have gathered completely by rollover on Monday night.
December 28, 2013 - Bank error no longer in your favor. Sorry.
December 06, 2013 - Thrust-Smack, Lunging Thrust-Smack and Northern Explosion now multiply bonus damage as well as weapon damage, if you're a Seal Clubber.
December 03, 2013 - 17 and 18 are now different numbers. Happy Crimbo!
November 26, 2013 - Saucemaggedon it. Are you gettin' it? Yes you are. Yesterday you weren't, but today you are, because Saucemaggedon is fixed.
November 21, 2013 - Pastamancers who just want to be alone and brood and sulk can now dismiss their current Pasta Thrall from the skills page.
November 21, 2013 - Batter Up should now work correctly with Iron Palm Technique. Swords for bats. Keep bats sharp. Gracias.
November 20, 2013 - Shield of the Pastalord might actually do something now. Maybe.
November 20, 2013 - For the next 30 days, you can unperm any normal Guild-sold skill for a Karma refund. This boring crap is in Options->Account.
November 19, 2013 - Do Not Open 'Til Crimbo boxes are now available. Happy pre-Thanksgiving.
November 14, 2013 - The interface for putting equipment on familiars got way less stupid. Thanks, CDM!
November 13, 2013 - The HoBoCoBo glyph that was lost in the desert is now found in the desert.
November 07, 2013 - Seal Clubbers now autohit with their smacks if they have ANY club equipped, not just a 2-handed club.
October 31, 2013 - Fixed a bug that would briefly turn you into CDMoyer, output the word "balls" and then log you out.
October 30, 2013 - To correct an ancient oversight, the bounty hunting pants now have a slightly better enchantment.
October 30, 2013 - On the advice of guild UI consultants, guild trainers no longer display skills you've already purchased.
October 25, 2013 - Break one nine one. The new walkie-talkie is now a free pull from Hagnk's. Over.
October 21, 2013 - The Pigsticker of Violence is less stupid now.
October 09, 2013 - Fixed a display issue that was making Fury look like it was giving too little bonus damage.
September 30, 2013 - Hibernate now clears Beaten Up, like a good hibernation should.
September 28, 2013 - Fixed a stupid bug that was making the Toot Oriole's tasks impossible to complete. Welcome to the Kingdom, and sorry!
September 27, 2013 - Fixed a bug in the Lunging Thrust Smack code that made it so it wasn't hitting as often after the revamp.
September 24, 2013 - Items and effects that gave +damage against werewolves, vampires, bugbears, zombies, skeletons and Mer-kin now give +%damage.
September 18, 2013 - Scaling monsters now award stats based on your mainstat, rather than (because of the way scaling works) your Moxie.
September 17, 2013 - The Old Man will now sell you that crappy SCUBA gear even when you already have other ways to breathe underwater.
September 17, 2013 - The Hidden Park now has the old Hidden City semirare adventure in it. It still features a hilarious shrink/shrink joke.
September 08, 2013 - The Jack-in-the-Box has been made more powerful and less predictable. The secret tiny knife the clown had is now uselessly dull.
September 06, 2013 - Jick sez: I probably broke a bunch of minor stuff over the last couple of hours. Stay tuned for future trivials where I fix them!
September 03, 2013 - The blood pressure cuff from the Hidden City is now properly called a sphygmomanometer. We apologize for the earlier oversight.
August 29, 2013 - Fixed an infinite Meat bug. Yikes! Thanks a million to KbobK for responsibly reporting it.
August 26, 2013 - If you're in KOLHS, boozes you can't drink should now be properly struck out and filtered. Cold filtered. Like a mountain stream.
August 17, 2013 - The Gelatinous Cubeling, like an old, syphilitic dog, has learned some disgusting new tricks.
August 14, 2013 - The smut orc pervert is no longer fax/puttyable. Other stuff was tweaked to make this less annoying.
July 29, 2013 - Giving the Carriageman booze now shows up in the clan dungeon logs. Giving the Carriageman logs will get you punched.
July 29, 2013 - A large number of minor Dreadsylvania bugs were fixed. We now feel confident that there are zero bugs, and also that 1 equals 2.
July 29, 2013 - Blessed large boxes can now be used in quantity. Blessed large boxes can now be used in quantity.
July 27, 2013 - Elemental phials must now be made with new higher-level ingredients. Old phials have been converted to lotions.
July 27, 2013 - You can now save up to 99 custom outfits. One for each of your problems.
July 11, 2013 - Food and booze items that grant effects now display the effect they grant in their description pop-up. Thanks, Uncle CDM!
July 09, 2013 - Item descriptions for reusable combat items now say (reusable) on them. To indicate that the combat item is reusable.
July 02, 2013 - You can now show off how many recipes you've discovered. Enable it on the privacy tab of the options menu.
June 26, 2013 - Sorting and filtering inventory options should now be remembered between logins. (Because those pages are now elephant powered.)
June 26, 2013 - The PvP ranks section of the profile has been cleaned up and King of the Hill time for the current season is now displayed.
June 26, 2013 - You may now show off your Monster Manuel fact gathering skills on your profile. (Enable it in on the Privacy tab of the Options page.)
June 18, 2013 - Once you've gotten a perfect score on Dungeon Fist, you should now get a button to auto-finish it.
June 18, 2013 - You can now filter Monster Manuel to only show monsters that you have partially researched.
June 18, 2013 - By popular request, a new thing has been added which, like all the good things in life, involves a large number of skeletons.
June 18, 2013 - Added an alternate display option for Monster Manuel's combat stats. See your Combat Options menu for details.
June 11, 2013 - Fixed a weird case that would stop Sven Golly from letting you give dudes things in a place. That place also has pictures now.
June 11, 2013 - Oil pans should now properly allow the casting of Sauceror buffs.
June 06, 2013 - Pinch Ghost, which had one job, is now no longer terrible at its job.
June 06, 2013 - Made the second and third damage-o-blasts from Hobopolis spells actually count as spells for various purposes. Lanterns greener.
June 06, 2013 - Fixed a very old bug that was preventing bonus elemental spell damage from being applied to some spells.
May 30, 2013 - Finishing the level 10 quest now unlocks a new, totally narratively justified shortcut on the top floor.
May 22, 2013 - Dolphin whistles no longer have a 10-turn cooldown. Blow 'em if you got 'em.
May 14, 2013 - You are now unable to begin a new non-casual reincarnation on a day when you already began a non-casual reincarnation. Yeah.
May 14, 2013 - Ascensions now start counting days on the day you reincarnate, rather than the day you jumped the gash.
May 08, 2013 - Items gotten as a reward from the Old Man now properly support right-clicking.
May 06, 2013 - Swarms of ghuol whelps will now prevent autoattack from firing.
April 30, 2013 - Sushi-rolling mats can now be Bought from Big Brother in Bulk. Happy Tuesday!
April 29, 2013 - The Economist of Scales now has buttons to trade in all of a given type of fish scale at once.
April 23, 2013 - The pre-Groar Icy Peak now has some Last Adventure stuff going on.
April 16, 2013 - Your newest underwater gear is worth the sea salt crystals it smashes into now (like it always should have).
April 11, 2013 - There is no such thing as a vampire cape.
April 09, 2013 - Mr. Store got some nicer shelves.
April 08, 2013 - Gladiators in the Sea are now resistant to same-round stuns. (We call those "staggers" in case you want to talk like us cool kids.)
March 17, 2013 - The Sea Cape is a little better. This will hopefully assuage any Cape Fear you might have been experiencing.
March 15, 2013 - The soil in An Octopus's Garden is richer and loamier than it used to be.
March 13, 2013 - Wednesday's Watery Work: Seven Sea Semirares.
March 10, 2013 - Racecar Bob got a new puppy.
March 09, 2013 - The Old Man's SCUBA tank is now old, rather than rusty. Stupid complicated game.
March 04, 2013 - Consumables are now sortable by size and "things I can use" now understands Jick^H^H^H^H^Jarlsberg's germ phobia.
March 01, 2013 - By popular demand, Jarlsberg's pan will no longer dissolve goat's milk. Also, Eleron is popular.
February 19, 2013 - You can now get a normal description popup by right-clicking an icon on Jarlsberg's skill page. Also it works better in IE8 now.
February 18, 2013 - Trigger Warning: A-Boo Clues now have to be used in order to trigger their encounters.
February 18, 2013 - The Avatar of Jarlsberg path boss should now drop Instant Karma when appropriate. In other news, 100 and 0 are different numbers.
February 17, 2013 - I fixed a typo that was preventing Jarlsberg's creamy staff from doing what it was supposed to do.
February 15, 2013 - Gourd POTIONS now recognize that Jarlsberg is a wizard. Why is everything so difficult?
February 15, 2013 - The Captain of the Gourd now recognizes Jarlsberg for the wizard he is.
February 05, 2013 - Food and non-booze beverages now show their size in their descriptions. Not that non-booze beverages are of any interest to anybody.
January 31, 2013 - Several new Monster Manuel avatar items have been added to the Angry Jung Man content. You'll dress like a thing and like it.
January 29, 2013 - Avatar-changing items unlocked by Monster Manuel are now relegated to a lonely, cold, dark little corner of your inventory. -snif-
January 27, 2013 - Zone stat warnings no longer trigger if you have Teleportitis. It took four tries to post this trivial update in the right place.
January 25, 2013 - You can now use more than one psychoanalytic jar per day. This does not apply to jars used on extra-crazy people.
January 15, 2013 - That whole "make as many as possible" thing has been added to the new Mystic interface.
January 08, 2013 - Made some backend changes to the way the Crackpot Mystic works.
January 06, 2013 - There is now a Mall search category for content-unlocking items. It is labeled "Content Unlockers."
December 26, 2012 - Taco Dan's Taco Stand has ceased its hithertofore-seemingly-ceaseless advertising campaign.
December 17, 2012 - Back slot items can now be Pulverized.
December 17, 2012 - Do Not Open 'Til Crimbo boxes are now available in The Gift Shop for your Crimbo gifting needs.
December 11, 2012 - Ninja Snowman assassins now drop coal buttons for bounty hunters.
November 20, 2012 - Players on the Class Act challenge path are no longer restricted from entering The Sea.
November 19, 2012 - The oil pan should now work from inventory, and the Smile of Mr. A. should no longer charge 1MP for no reason.
November 16, 2012 - Some changes were made to the way critical hits work. See the forums for details.
November 15, 2012 - Those of you still messing with the mime soul forge can now create multiple items in a single visit.
November 14, 2012 - A thing that used to only happen half the time now happens all the time. In a place. You know what I'm talking about.
November 02, 2012 - The nanorhino's character pane nano-icon now becomes nano-animated when he is fully nano-charged. Nano.
October 29, 2012 - Glancing blows with clubs will no longer ruin mother hellseal bits, and adorable seal larvae will no longer attack their own kind.
October 15, 2012 - Once-in-a-lifetime monsters should now always grant factoids to Monster Manuel. (If we didn't screw something up, of course.)
October 12, 2012 - I believe we have exterminated the elusive "auxiliary backbone doesn't give its extra fights properly... sometimes..." bug.
October 09, 2012 - The mall search form now has a "Mr. Store" category.
October 09, 2012 - Meat Maids have gotten off of your lawns, and into your cars. I mean your dwelling inspection links. This is only cosmetic.
October 05, 2012 - If you're not in Ronin or Hardcore, you can now use each of your Tomes 3 times per day.
September 26, 2012 - Added a couple of character-pane-slimming toggles to the Interface section of the options menu. Get in shape, girl!
August 27, 2012 - 12 days from now, Mall store logs should start going back 2 weeks instead of 2 days. In the interim, the interim. Respectively.
August 24, 2012 - Zombie Slayers should now properly get the Muscle class 50% HP bonus.
August 17, 2012 - Deleveling opponents should no longer make them drop crappier brains.
August 17, 2012 - Some back-end changes have been made regarding removal of effects:
August 15, 2012 - A few new options have been added for Mall store shopkeepers.
August 14, 2012 - Any ascension on which you drop any path will henceforth be ineligible for all ascension leaderboards.
August 13, 2012 - Because I can no longer remember why it wasn't always like this, item descriptions for booze now show how potent the booze is.
August 07, 2012 - General Store, miffed about what he now refers to as the "Hatorade Betrayal", has cornered the dingy planks market.
August 06, 2012 - Hatorade has been moved from General Store's Store to the Admiral's Snack Bar.
August 01, 2012 - The drop rate on the dwarf foreman's items has been increased. Probably not as much as you'd like.
August 01, 2012 - The mysticality requirement on eXtreme mittens is no longer quite so eXtreme.
July 27, 2012 - Hojo Hominygrits is the greatest! (By which I mean puppet strings are also now a free pull.)
July 27, 2012 - Cursed Microwaves and Pony Kegs are now free pulls from Hangk's.
July 16, 2012 - The Cape of the Goblin King turned out to be too much of a choking hazard, so it was changed to a codpiece.
July 16, 2012 - Back items now work with custom outfits, Yay! The also will now display and respect their stat requirements, Boo!
July 12, 2012 - Elemental resistance items and effects now have a number telling you how many levels they give. Character sheet display, too.
July 09, 2012 - You no longer have to be sober to de-prism the King. Just be careful. That prism is sharp, and he's not as young as he once was.
July 05, 2012 - Hot dog! Hot eggs.
July 05, 2012 - The lost key is slightly less lost.
July 05, 2012 - Two new long-requested chefstaves have been added. Go see Rodoric (get it? Rod-o-ric?) immediately.
July 04, 2012 - The Summoning Chamber has been recalibrated to accept both pre and post-fire demon names. They will also be reflected in your quest journal once used. Yeti and Pen Pal names did not survive.
July 03, 2012 - All of the compact versions of PvP minigame outcomes should now provide the same information as the long versions.
June 16, 2012 - The world event is no longer preventing access to Suburban Dis. You can also now [use] FDKOL commendations to get to the tent.
June 08, 2012 - The way the goth kid hands out PvP fights has changed. It now starts out way faster and slows down over time.
June 06, 2012 - Huge pumpkins can now be smashed into three regular pumpkins. Which is to say you can now cut them like they want me to.
May 31, 2012 - Jick is doing an AMA on reddit! Go ask him anything.
May 22, 2012 - Using reodorant now dispels the effect of deodorant, and vice versa. Likewise with Musk of the Moose and Smooth Movements.
May 21, 2012 - Did I say 50? I meant 100.
May 21, 2012 - Tradition is important to us here at Asymmetric. Flavour of Magic has been given the old "Iron Palm Technique" treatment.
May 21, 2012 - Iron Palm Technique is now a togglable intrinsic instead of a whadyacallit. Self-buff.
May 16, 2012 - Bouquets and barbed-wire and picket fences are no longer campsite items. #1 and #3 have been repurposed, #2 has been reporpoised.
May 02, 2012 - It is now possible to PvP while drunk. Because, why not?
May 01, 2012 - Hermit Permits are no longer consumed, so you only need one. The Hermit Script now increases his daily clover allotment by 1.
May 01, 2012 - The Hermit's inventory is now visible even if you don't have passes or trinkets. Also rims have been moved to the General Store.
May 01, 2012 - In a brief but decisive battle, the Market Demon has been ousted by General Store.
April 30, 2012 - Fighting a rat out of the faucet now gives you a one-click link to fight another one.
April 30, 2012 - Fixed a dumb (old) bug that made all hatrack/scarecrow attacks deal prismatic damage. I hate rainbows.
April 26, 2012 - Items that give you skills should now have a link to the skill in their description. Let me know if I missed any.
April 16, 2012 - The steam lines on the hot tub in clan VIP lounges is now an indication of how many more times you can use it today.
April 13, 2012 - You can now remove yourself from a clan's whitelist. Not that you would.
April 11, 2012 - The Knights and Maidens encounter in the Haunted Gallery is now ignorable (and stays away for a while when you ignore it.)
April 05, 2012 - If you're in Ronin or HC and you beat a Hobopolis boss, any items he would've dropped for you will now go into a package for later.
March 29, 2012 - Wee had knot maid a knew meatsmithing recipe inn a wile sew wee maid a gnu won. Wee hope yew fined it and like it.
March 28, 2012 - Clan VIP Crimbo trees now reset to a 7-day wait when you ascend.
March 24, 2012 - Character and chat panes now remember between sessions that you resized them. All things are possible with the magic of FRAMES.
March 01, 2012 - When you use a new familiar hatchling, it'll now give you a button that lets you take that familiar with you immediately.
March 01, 2012 - Verily and forsooth, the various bits of Clancy's quest now have Quest Log entries.
March 01, 2012 - Mosquitoes, like your mom, now bite a little harder and a little more often.
March 01, 2012 - Because we got sick of the blackbird screwing everything up all the time, intrinsic effects on items are no longer a thing.
February 29, 2012 - Pop-up familiar descriptions now have blue text describing the familiar's function. Conjunction Junction.
February 18, 2012 - The Shadow in the Sorceress's Tower also no longer destroys combat items. Missed that one before.
February 17, 2012 - The Kloop and Groose now have (disappointing) Crown of Thrones behaviors.
February 15, 2012 - The Bonerdagon and the Naughty Sorceress no longer destroy combat items when they block them. They just block them when they block them.
January 25, 2012 - Some changes have been made to Skin of the Leatherback and some of the Maximum HP and MP passive skills.
January 12, 2012 - Trivial: You can now empty your closet in one click from the bottom of the closet interface. Also, equipped familiar equipment should no longer incorrectly go to the closet after ascending.
January 03, 2012 - Uncle Crimbo's candy fashion accessory gifts may now be traded.
January 02, 2012 - Fixed a bug that was causing the Groose to not properly give bonus stats after combat. Sorry 'bout that...
December 27, 2011 - The description for familiar larval items will now show you what familiar the item hatches into.
December 18, 2011 - Uncle Crimbo got enough Comet Pops, and doesn't really want any more. Candy value adjusted accordingly!
December 06, 2011 - We've changed Hagnk's "Pull All" feature. See for hot deets.
November 17, 2011 - A method now exists to manually add wear-and-tear to certain cherished tomes, if for some reason that was something you wanted to do.
October 24, 2011 - Made some quality-of-life changes to the way old clan dungeon logs are viewed. Mostly reductions, specifically.
October 19, 2011 - The "other accomplishments" section of the Quest Log now displays how much Karma you have banked. Red gold and greeeeeen.
October 18, 2011 - Clan leaders can now grant access to ALL dungeons to a particular rank. Spelunk Everywhere.
October 18, 2011 - Limited-time skill books now turn into used copies when used. Also moistened copies when moistened. Details in the forums.
October 17, 2011 - Outfit names can now be clicked for a description of the bonuses you get from wearing the outfit.
October 16, 2011 - Added a spooky speed leaderboard for Haunted Sorority House runs.
October 06, 2011 - Sigh. Made the least funny trivial update ever. Now stop whining.
October 04, 2011 - All monsters that heal themselves (such as physicians) now display how many HP they're regaining.
September 21, 2011 - Instead of nothing, dungeon dragon chests now contain dumb jokes and Meat.
August 10, 2011 - Items and effects that give you elemental resistance have been made to work better at the low end.
June 22, 2011 - The continuum transfunctioner has been converted from an offhand item to an accessory. Hiiiiii-ya!
June 17, 2011 - Freeing Ralph in a Hardcore run will now give you access to all of your Normal permed skills. Unless you're in Bad Moon.
June 08, 2011 - All *GISH*es are now 100% less puply.
June 06, 2011 - Mail from your insufferable Pen Pal will now appear in its own tab on the messages screen.
May 14, 2011 - The giant garbage is now clickable for jokes and clues about the level 10 quest. Clicking the grounds will plant a bean if you have one.
May 03, 2011 - Because of OMINOUS FOREBODING, the Badger, Llama, Pixie, and Sandworm will now drop their goodies more reliably. Scared yet?
April 25, 2011 - Had the amazing idea to add in a recipe we forgot to put in relating to an Amazing Idea.
April 25, 2011 - Having high buffed Mysticality now reduces the rate at which the Naughty Sorceress blocks spells. Also some other stuff.
April 20, 2011 - There now an account option to stop displaying that moldy-ass pumpkin you've had on your profile for so long.
April 18, 2011 - Fixed a bug that was letting the Cyrpt sub-bosses show up after being defeated because of Teleportitis. Stupid teleportitis.
February 17, 2011 - .hgouht ,pu esle gnihtemos dewercs evah thgim I .s'kngaH morf llup eerf a won si worra s'emiT
February 17, 2011 - The bundle of receipts has been changed back to only dropping from Knob Goblin Bean Counters, and the number the BHH wants has been reduced.
January 13, 2011 - The pool game adventure in the Haunted Billiards Room no longer requires you to have a pool cue equipped.
January 12, 2011 - The old semi-rare adventures have been added into the new Friars' zones. Sorry that took so long.
January 09, 2011 - The range of possible adventures you can get from a lot of foods has been tightened.
December 17, 2010 - The BGE merchandising department has caught up on its holiday backlog, and is now happily serving customers again.
December 15, 2010 - Instead of dropping snakehead charms, gaudy pirates now drop a key to a box that contains the charm. This will make sense later.
December 06, 2010 - Mr. Store familiars can now be placed in your terrarium after a bad moon run, once you recall skills and familiars.
November 09, 2010 - The Council of Loathing has installed a sweet new Adventurer Signal.
November 09, 2010 - The Untinker will now give you the screwdriver quest as soon as you meet him, with no prerequisites.
November 05, 2010 - The new phone books are here! The new phone books are here! I mean... Market Square has been cleaned up and got a new fountain.
November 05, 2010 - Mr. Alarm will now show you how to get to Whitey's Grove if you don't already know. Also he'll take the stew you dish out early.
November 02, 2010 - The He-Boulder's eye-rays now give you an effect that prevents them from being used again, rather than using an invisible counter.
November 02, 2010 - The bitchin' meatcar can no longer be Untinkered. Commence to grumbling.
October 30, 2010 - The Grim Grimacite Site has disappeared in a freak (or... is it?) tectonic event. The shifting sands have moved other bits of the desert around a little.
October 27, 2010 - The Bounty Hunter Hunter will no longer refuse to give you a new bounty if you forgot to turn in yesterday's bounty until today.
October 13, 2010 - Fixed a bug that was making the Hermitage fail to show up under certain circumstances. Certain SEXY circumstances...
October 07, 2010 - KoL holidays should now get posted to the Twitter feed. Unless I screwed something up. Which, knowing me, I probably did.
October 07, 2010 - The Captain of the Gourd's quest now shows up in the Quest Tracker (only the first time you do it.)
October 06, 2010 - The Pretentious Artist's quest has been streamlined a little, and will now appear in the Quest Tracker.
October 05, 2010 - All starting combat skills have had their MP cost removed if you are the appropriate class for the skill.
October 05, 2010 - A new top menu interface option has been added. You'll probably hate it.
October 05, 2010 - There was never a sewer in Seaside Town.
October 05, 2010 - The turtle totem has been changed from a combat item to a weapon.
September 02, 2010 - Bigg has reopened his dig. He's in the nearby plains soliciting more help.
August 24, 2010 - There's no more missing art in the Ancient Pyramid. Finally.
August 17, 2010 - We've reduced the number of dudes that will attack the Mini-Hipster in a day, but made the attacks more likely.
August 03, 2010 - The Mini-Hipster can now sit in the Crown of Thrones. Sorry about that.
July 29, 2010 - This year's Comic Con CYOA is now available at (Number 5 is alive!)
July 19, 2010 - Fixed a bug where casting a buff with the opera mask on the Mad Hatrack would cause spaceships to start punching each other.
July 14, 2010 - Your autoattack will no longer fire against rampaging adding machines.
July 11, 2010 - The clan membership roster now has pagination controls at the bottom as well as the top, and has been cleaned up a bit.
July 02, 2010 - Fixed a logic mistake that was causing Mr. Alarm to behave in a nonsensical way.
June 28, 2010 - The super sweet boom box actually works now (and properly lets you have four AT songs in your head.)
June 20, 2010 - After a visit from the Fauxtari repairman, Dungeon Fist in the Game Grid Arcade is now up and running.
May 26, 2010 - The Knight's Armor and Fancy Tux outfits should now have Trick-or-Treat candy. Sorry 'bout that.
April 22, 2010 - Having quick actions set to auto-attack should no longer cause weird issues with the first round of combat being repeated.
April 22, 2010 - Fixed a bug that was allowing Slime Tube runs that were too fast to properly satisfy Mother Slime.
April 19, 2010 - Astral beings can once again communicate with others via chat. (Except badgers.)
April 15, 2010 - The plexiglass pike pike has undergone a slight alteration, and is now a 2-handed club.
March 31, 2010 - Recent familiars have been added to the doppelshifter/wardrobe rotation, and that code has been rewritten to be more efficient.
March 23, 2010 - In the descriptions of items that grant intrinsic effects, you can now click the effect name to view its details.
March 18, 2010 - Monsters in the Dungeons of Doom have been made stronger, to match their newly-introduced counterparts.
March 04, 2010 - Fixed a bug that was making reflections of maps drop way less reliably than they should have been. Off with CDMoyer's head!
February 11, 2010 - Items and effects that give you + Food drops from monsters now apply to cooking ingredients as well as edible items.
February 09, 2010 - Inigo's Incantation of Inspiration is now properly shruggable.
February 08, 2010 - Things that stun monsters will now properly tell you when they wear off. Hooray, 2-year-old bug fix!
February 02, 2010 - The scrolls from the Valley now tell you which scroll they were when used them in combat.
January 30, 2010 - Items marked as "Free pull from Hagnk's" may now be removed from your display case during Hardcore or Ronin.
January 26, 2010 - Potion-type items now have a clickable indication of what effect they'll give you in their description popup.
January 08, 2010 - Did some minor interface cleanup on the Skills page.
December 18, 2009 - The Pastamancer and Sauceror Crimbo spells should now be dealing with bonus spell damage properly.
December 17, 2009 - Don Crimbo should now give you any quest items you may have lost by ascending in the middle of his quest line.
December 16, 2009 - Even though it's TOTALLY still funny, chatbot has been made immune to jawbruisers.
December 15, 2009 - The previous update has been undone on account of it being dumb in retrospect.
December 15, 2009 - A change has been made to the way scaling monsters' defense stat is calculated. See this post for details.
December 15, 2009 - Fixed a typo in the fight code that made scaling monsters sometimes begin combat with fewer than zero hit points.
December 14, 2009 - You will no longer find any fancy chocolates in any battered Crimbo Crates. They'd have been gross, anyways.
December 08, 2009 - Recalling ancient memories in Bad Moon will now give you your familiars back in addition to your skills.
December 08, 2009 - You can now set your character and menu panes to compact mode independently of one another.
October 27, 2009 - All effects that give familiars additional experience now work in the arena as well as in combat.
October 22, 2009 - All of the fishes in the Briny Deeps should now be a bit more forthcoming with their meat.
October 07, 2009 - Fixed a longstanding bug that was making astral mushrooms, gongs, and agua de vida drop a little less often than they should have.
October 05, 2009 - The wriggling flytrap pellet should now be considerably easier to get.
September 30, 2009 - Recent event notifcations can now be viewed from the kmail screen.
September 29, 2009 - Found and fixed a couple more ways in which the whole clan karma retention thing could get messed up.
September 27, 2009 - The starting combat skills from each class can now be permed. Oh, and so can my hair -- I'll be so pretty!
September 23, 2009 - Mr. Store familiar larvae are now free pulls from Hagnk's.
September 11, 2009 - The most recent few familiars have been added to the possibility list for the doppelshifter / wardrobe.
September 01, 2009 - Big bundles of chamoix may now be used more than one at a time. Happy wiping!
September 01, 2009 - Evil noodle dishes should now properly give Pastamancers MP when consumed.
August 19, 2009 - A cool new meatpasting recipe has been added, using some (very) old ingredients.
August 18, 2009 - You should now always get a notification if using a skill causes you to lose a negative effect. Also fixed a minor napping bug.
August 17, 2009 - Fixed a couple of bugs with the pressurized air potion. I would enumerate them, but Firefox 3.5 has broken the trivial updates form in a really, really obnoxious way.
August 05, 2009 - Skill description popups will now tell you which combat skills are considered "spells."
August 05, 2009 - Properly-sized rock monsters should now be showing up in Hobopolis and the Slime Tube.
August 05, 2009 - All of the lobsters in the Kingdom suddenly remembered that they are aquatic creatures.
August 04, 2009 - If you move from one clan you're whitelisted in to another, your clan Karma will now be given back to you when you return.
August 01, 2009 - Pool tables and basements can now be searched for at the Clan Recruiter.
August 01, 2009 - The output when you put a familiar in your terrarium has been adjusted a little bit. What does this portend? Probably nothing.
July 30, 2009 - Fearful Fettucini's MP cost has been reduced so that it continues to match Weapon of the Pastalord.
July 16, 2009 - Special monster encounters (like Feast of Boris monsters) should no longer override semirare adventures (or happen in Noob Cave.)
July 06, 2009 - Fixed a bug that made the Bow Tie Bat better at pickpocketing than it was supposed to be. Sorry 'bout that.
July 06, 2009 - Saucestorm should now properly trigger a charge in the Bag o' Tricks. Apparently one of its tricks was a typo.
July 06, 2009 - The message you get from Hero of the Half Shell about fending off damage with your shield now only displays if the skill actually triggers.
July 02, 2009 - Clay beads and class rings from the island war are no longer quest items. We forget why we made them that way initially.
July 02, 2009 - Jick should've called in stupid today. I meant Hardcore. Just Hardcore.
July 02, 2009 - The [open] function of the Bag o' Tricks can no longer be used in Ronin or Hardcore.
June 17, 2009 - A new set of chat commands has been added, see this forum post for details.
June 17, 2009 - Clan Dungeon permissions are now managed on a per-dungeon basis.
June 10, 2009 - Old raid logs now specify the dungeon you're looking at and the date of the run.
May 31, 2009 - Chester's muscle shirt is now more... muscly.
May 22, 2009 - The scaling +Monster Level granted by Ur-Kel's Aria of Annoyance has been capped at 60.
May 13, 2009 - The craftable shields from underwater have had their recipes adjusted to use a new kind of craftable shield instead of a buckler buckle. Now say "craftable shield" ten times fast.
May 09, 2009 - All Accordion Thief buffs now have unique icons.
May 08, 2009 - The island seal figurines are now available in the post-level-12 bombed-out versions of their respective zones.
May 04, 2009 - Thrust Smack and Lunging Thrust Smack now automatically hit if you are a Seal Clubber and wielding a 2-handed club. Club-a-dub-dub!
April 27, 2009 - People with multiple Custom Titles now have the option to have one randomly selected each time they log in.
April 24, 2009 - The Quest Log will now tell you which kind of ore the Trapper wants you to bring him.
April 17, 2009 - You'll now get a (x of y found) notification when collecting goat cheese for the Trapper.
April 15, 2009 - A hilarious (an hilarious?) cocktailcrafting recipe we overlooked has been added. Hi-larious.
March 31, 2009 - The code for automatically triggering KoL holidays has finally been completely standardized.
March 25, 2009 - All of the appropriate drops added today should now work in the stone mariachis.
March 24, 2009 - Underscores can now be used in candy hearts and personalized coffee mugs.
March 20, 2009 - A problem with the drop logic on a couple of the new underwater items has been fixed.
March 13, 2009 - The Mall search now lets you specify a maximum number of results per item. It has also been tweaked on the back end for accessibility. Most people won't notice a difference, but it should be easier on screen readers.
March 10, 2009 - The Hermitage is now visible whether you've got a Hermit Permit in inventory or not.
March 05, 2009 - The Crimbo story documentation has been updated with the events of the last couple of Crimbos.
February 25, 2009 - The number of hobo gristles required for the Sleazy Back Alley bounty has been corrected.
February 23, 2009 - The /buy command should now work with stuff from Doc Galaktik's.
February 19, 2009 - Spirit Hoboes and Gluttonous Green Ghosts can now be boozed-up and fed in quantity from the terrarium page.
February 16, 2009 - The Knob Goblin King will now drop the Cobb's Knob lab key if you haven't already found it by the time you defeat him.
February 15, 2009 - The Happy Salamander effect now actually does something. Sorry about that.
February 12, 2009 - Comma Chameleons in the form of aquatic familiars can now breathe underwater.
February 12, 2009 - The wheel choice in the pyramid's Middle Chamber will no longer show up once Ed has been defeated.
February 12, 2009 - Anti-anti-antidote has had its price reduced slightly, and is now sold by Doc Galaktik rather than at the Market.
February 12, 2009 - The bulkhead in the Wreck of the Edgar Fitzsimmons will now stop showing up for 20 turns if you ignore it.
February 12, 2009 - The chat command /note has been added, as a synonym for /notes.
February 09, 2009 - The duration of brined liver gained from crafted underwater drinks has been increased.
February 04, 2009 - The "Adventure Again" output for the Arid, Extra-Dry Desert will now also include a link to adventure in The Oasis, and vice versa.
January 26, 2009 - The k-mail interface now shows, in an HTML comment, the date and time of a message in MM/DD/YY HH:MM:SS format. This may be of use to people writing software that interfaces with it.
January 26, 2009 - Hagnk is now available (via the actual game interface) during the entirety of a Bad Moon run, so you can get free-pull items out and annoy people with them.
January 23, 2009 - After your first ascension, you no longer have to look at each page of the MacGuffin diary to start that page's section of the quest.
January 23, 2009 - Yossarian will now tell you where he lost each of his tools, even if you're not in uniform when you talk to him.
January 23, 2009 - For the purposes of the level 11 quest, Lord Spookyraven's spectacles now work from inventory if you've ascended at least once.
January 19, 2009 - There are now Quest Log entries for the Sea Monkee quest line.
January 19, 2009 - There's now a plaque in the museum (and a line in your accomplishments, potentially) about the Crimbomination event.
January 15, 2009 - The hidden +Noncombat Chance on the Yendorian Finery outfit has been removed.
January 15, 2009 - The much-maligned, super-secret hidden interaction between +Monster Level and +Noncombat Chance has been removed.
January 13, 2009 - The activation process for new accounts has been streamlined a bit.
January 12, 2009 - All underwater gear (crafted and dropped) should now properly Pulverize into sea salt.
December 18, 2008 - Fixed a bug that got introduced into the sushi system yesterday that was causing nigiri to take up more fullness than it should've.
December 18, 2008 - The campground has been cleaned up a little bit. No more unsightly extra column!
December 17, 2008 - The Bottle-Rocket Crossbow now works the same way in your off-hand as it does in your main hand.
December 12, 2008 - Fixed a display issue with Chester's moustache, and a problem where combat items purchased from the Mall wouldn't always show up properly during fights.
November 30, 2008 - The miscellaneous section of inventory has been altered slightly -- any quest item that is, for example, a potion type item will now be in the potion section and not the quest item section. I'm not sure if this actually changes anything or not.
November 28, 2008 - In an effort to clean up the campsite a bit, the cheap toaster, the Certificate of Participation and Feng Shui for Big Dumb Idiots have had their functionality tweaked a little bit.
November 23, 2008 - The sea fruits from Friday's rollout are now properly marked cocktailcraftable.
November 21, 2008 - Fixed a bug that made the proprietors of the Gnomish Micromicrobrewery allergic to martinis.
November 18, 2008 - Pastamancers now recover some MP when they eat pasta.
November 18, 2008 - The redemption prize for the haiku dungeon cereal boxtops is now implemented. Whee!
November 18, 2008 - Inventory is now split into Melee and Ranged weapons by default, and the related option has been removed from the account menu.
November 17, 2008 - There are no longer restrictions in place that prevent you from equipping weapons with a Mysticality requirement at the same time as weapons with a Muscle requirement.
November 11, 2008 - Tires in Burnbarrel Blvd. now stay ignored for 10 Adventures when you ignore them. Also, fixed a bug with the MP cost of some of the Moleform skills.
November 11, 2008 - Fixed several bugs that were causing spells to do less damage than they should've in certain situations. Thanks, pcentella!
November 11, 2008 - For normal weapon attacks that are being displayed in haiku with no numbers, you can now mouse over the picture of the weapon to see the actual damage you dealt.
November 11, 2008 - Mariachis across the Kingdom now recognize the calavera concertina as an accordion.
November 11, 2008 - Player profiles should now show when a player is in Ronin.
November 11, 2008 - The ring of half-assed regeneration no longer has a stat requirement.
November 10, 2008 - The Hobopolis Marketplace will now stay away from you for 10 Adventures if you choose to ignore it.
October 24, 2008 - Prismatic wads are now correctly marked as Jewelrycrafting components. Hooray, new old content! Boo, testing!
October 20, 2008 - Much like the accidentally unannounced update to a handful of accessories on Friday, a few offhand items have had their equipment requirements changed.
October 17, 2008 - Yo. All yo-yo type weapons should now have yo-yo specific attack messages.
October 17, 2008 - You will now get occasional notifications after fights if you've got the Strung-Up Quartet playing a song for you.
October 14, 2008 - Doc Galaktik's herb gathering quest will now be available from the beginning for characters who have ascended at least once.
October 14, 2008 - To avoid possible confusion, you're no longer explicitly told about the second adventure being taken from you when you adventure Underwater.
October 12, 2008 - Fixed the issue that was making the last turn of the new fish bits effect not work properly.
October 10, 2008 - Quest progression through all of the Defiled areas of the Cyrpt now behaves consistently. The Alcove used to be different, now all of the zones act like the Alcove.
October 07, 2008 - There's a minor new item for sale in the Market in Seaside Town.
October 07, 2008 - The Captain of the Gourd now tells you how many you have of the items he's looking for, if you have any. Of the items he's looking for.
October 07, 2008 - Bounties currently assigned to you by the Bounty Hunter Hunter will now be displayed as an active quest in your Quest Log.
October 07, 2008 - The Vampire Hunter in the Distant Woods will now ignore you for ten turns if you tell him to go away.
October 03, 2008 - The side alleys of Hobopolis should now behave more consistently when their respective overlords have been defeated.
October 01, 2008 - The enchantments on the crazy bastard sword have been altered.
September 30, 2008 - When equipping custom outfits, not being able to equip one of the items for ANY reason should no longer prevent the entire outfit from being equipped.
September 30, 2008 - Clan dungeon administrators can now use the /ann command in dungeon channels to make an announcement. It's green!
September 30, 2008 - Several additional Hobopolis events now generate chat announcements.
September 30, 2008 - The list of crafting discovery counts in the Quest Log now has bits that link to the relevant crafting discovery pages.
September 29, 2008 - The Quest log "Reminder:" thing now supports multiple reminders.
September 28, 2008 - The off-by-one error with the Hobopolis tent flap should be fixed now. Sorry 'bout that.
September 25, 2008 - The flap on the tent door in the Hobopolis Town Square will now display as open if it's possible for you to go into it. You might have to do some reloading to clear the old images out of your browser cache.
September 24, 2008 - Really sticky and really really sticky spider webs are now combat items.
September 22, 2008 - Fixed an ancient typo that was causing Disco Dance II: Electric Boogaloo to do less damage than it was supposed to.
September 18, 2008 - Creating a new account no longer fails to give feedback. Sorry that was broken for so long...
September 13, 2008 - Switching clans should no longer force you to stop listening to /hobopolis when it doesn't need to.
September 09, 2008 - A player's class now shows up on his/her profile page if he/she has a custom title. And is a hermaphrodite.
September 09, 2008 - Player class now shows up (and is sortable) in the detailed clan roster.
September 09, 2008 - Fixed a bug with band flyers continuing to show up in combat after being taken away by a promoter.
September 09, 2008 - Haiku mode should no longer suppress icicle messages in Exposure Esplanade.
September 09, 2008 - When you sing a Yuletide Troll carol for another player, the event notification now tells you which carol it was.
September 01, 2008 - If you try to equip a custom outfit but are missing items in the outfit, the game will now equip as much of the outfit as it can rather than doing nothing.
August 29, 2008 - The chat's repetition filter no longer affects /hobopolis.
August 28, 2008 - The limited-cast AT buffs from Hobopolis can now be cast 10 times per day, up from 5.
August 26, 2008 - The snowcone update from earlier has now also been applied to astral cupcakes. Enjoy!
August 26, 2008 - If you're having trouble keeping up with all of these trivial updates, try the new /trivial chat command! It'll recap the last 5!
August 26, 2008 - NPC and Mall stores now give you feedback on how much Meat you spent when you purchase items.
August 26, 2008 - Post-war, McMillicancuddy's farm will no longer display a (1) once you're out of ducks for the day.
August 26, 2008 - The stupid old chat (stupid) should no longer be all spamtastic in /hobopolis. Sorry about that.
August 26, 2008 - Snowcones are now multiusable, and you can now use another red one (for instance) if your tongue is already red (for instance).
August 25, 2008 - Players can no longer be booted from clans while busy in a fight or choice adventure in a clan dungeon.
August 13, 2008 - Fixed a whole buttload of typos today. Thank you, people from the forum thread about typos!
August 12, 2008 - Lion oil, bird ribs, and wet stew are no longer quest items. Their drop rates have also been tweaked a little bit.
August 06, 2008 - You can now "lock" familiar equipment which all familiars can use, forcing all your active familiars to use the locked equipment without having to unequip and re-equip it from different familiars.
August 05, 2008 - The combat action bar for Bird Form has been altered -- Pick Pocket has been moved to "–" and repeat action is now at "=".
August 01, 2008 - The loot distribution menu in clan dungeons now has "- select a player -" as its first option. Hopefully this will cut down on accidental loot distribution without the inconvenience (and eventual irrelevance) of a confirmation box.
August 01, 2008 - Black puddings and drum machines now give the equivalent of "Adventure Again" after using one starts a fight.
August 01, 2008 - The placeholder text for Ol' Scratch's salad fork and Frosty's frosty mug has finally been replaced.
July 28, 2008 - Richard can now create multiple scarehobos at once. UPDATE SPREE!
July 28, 2008 - Rainbow Gravitation will now gray out (in supported browsers) when you have expended your daily uses of the skill.
July 28, 2008 - Grubs, moths, and ants found while in the form of a bird are now all multi-usable. Additionally, grubs and moths have been marked as HP and MP restorers and can be used from Quick Skills.
July 23, 2008 - The new Halloween candies from yesterday are now implemented.
July 23, 2008 - Fixed a very old bug with + elemental spell damage where one type of damage was mistakenly being applied to multiple elements.
July 18, 2008 - Some random and not at all meaningful tectonic activity has shuffled things around in the Big Mountains.
July 15, 2008 - Fixed a couple of bugs with inter-zone behaviors in Hobopolis. Certain acts were far more powerful than they were supposed to be.
July 12, 2008 - The Knob Goblin King no longer shows up in his chamber after you've beaten him.
July 10, 2008 - Fixed some code that was causing the Sombrero formula to not round the way it was supposed to.
July 09, 2008 - Fixed a bug that made weird blank clans show up on some of the clan leaderboards.
July 08, 2008 - Equipment that grants intrinsics that change stats (e.g.: leather chaps) are now flapping in the breeze. I mean, working again.
July 08, 2008 - All yodeling in Hobopolis should now be properly logged.
July 07, 2008 - The dropdown containing people who are eligible for undistributed clan loot now displays an abbreviation for the player's class.
July 05, 2008 - The reminder feature added earlier today now triggers even if you have the Yellow Exclamation Points suppressed. Inch-mile for the win!
July 05, 2008 - A number of Hobopolis-related things are now being tracked in Clan Activity Logs.
July 05, 2008 - If you preface a line of text in your quest log notes with "reminder:" it will now show up in your Yellow Exclamation Points.
July 05, 2008 - The item introduced yesterday has been modified such that it's now possible to use it in a Boozetafarian or Teetotaler run.
July 05, 2008 - The buffs granted by new Accordion Thief skills should now be shruggable.
July 04, 2008 - The "%miscadventuretext" bug in the description of a certain choice adventure has been fixed.
July 04, 2008 - That, uhh, thing, the one that wasn't enabled for the 4th of July this year? It's enabled now.
July 02, 2008 - Having equipment forcibly removed no longer leaves intrinsic enchantments behind.
June 30, 2008 - A bunch of effect images have been changed for diversity's sake. And Pete's.
June 27, 2008 - Pedantic hobo glyph collectors may now view in which zones they have found glyphs from the Quest Log page, even with the hobo code binder equipped.
June 26, 2008 - Elemental phials are now multiusable.
June 26, 2008 - Entering the chat in /hobopolis should now correctly indicate the number of players currently in the channel.
June 26, 2008 - Equipping items now gives a little more feedback than it used to.
June 24, 2008 - The image map for the main area of Hobopolis has been tweaked a bit to minimize unintentional adventuring.
June 23, 2008 - The familiar that can be purchased in Hobopolis now actually does something.
June 23, 2008 - Added a couple of drops for Zombo that I had forgotten to put in.
June 23, 2008 - The Staff of the Deepest Freeze can now be jiggled. Jiggle jiggle jiggle.
June 23, 2008 - You should now be able to say the name of a certain piratey yo-yo in chat without tripping an unrelated word filter. That being said, please do not drive the chat moderators insane by trying it out. Thanks.
June 22, 2008 - A bug with the CLEESH skill that caused the first action against the CLEESHee to result in thumb-twiddling has been fixed.
June 21, 2008 - Clan dungoneers wishing to set dungeon announcements apart from idle chatter may now change the color of said announcements using the Account Menu's "Manage Chat Colors" link.
June 20, 2008 - The hobo code binder is now a free pull from Hagnk's. Happy hunting, hardcorers!
June 19, 2008 - Accordion Thief buffs limited in casts per day should no longer consume uses/day when cast on players with too many songs in their head.
June 19, 2008 - Llama gongs now show up in the "Mostly Potions" section of your inventory.
June 19, 2008 - Added a new mayfly swarm behavior for the main Hobopolis zone.
June 19, 2008 - Fixed some weirdness in the space-time continuum in the sewers. It is no longer possible to become your own grandfather.
June 19, 2008 - The loot distribution menu in clan dungeons is now sorted by the number of turns each potential recipient spent in the dungeon. Sorted descending, by magnitude of descent, if you will.
June 19, 2008 - Anyone who goes into a clan basement can now see undistributed loot, even if they don't have permission to distribute it.
June 18, 2008 - All campsite dwellings now have unique messages when placed. Also when replaced. Rereplacing is out of luck.
June 18, 2008 - The clan dungeon loot distribution form now shows how many turns each eligible player spent in the dungeon.
June 17, 2008 - Fixed a broken choice adventure in one of the sleazier parts of Hobopolis.
June 17, 2008 - You'll now get a notification about access to basement chat channels when you go into your clan basement.
June 17, 2008 - Hobopolis loot distributions are now recorded in the clan dungeon log.
June 10, 2008 - Autoattack now works on a limited basis while you are in Bird Form. Currently only Attack with Your Weapon (beak) and Pick Pocket are implemented. Change your autoattack settings in the account menu.
June 06, 2008 - The hedge maze puzzle will no longer forget to check certain tiles for correctness, which previously allowed some players to complete the hedge maze in fewer rotations than before.
June 06, 2008 - Item descriptions for Spookyraven wine bottles can now be viewed on the (spoiler) form in the (spoiler) area of Spookyraven Manor. Bruce Wayne was unavailable for comment.
June 04, 2008 - The subzone issue in the Wine Cellar has finally been fixed for real. The junkyard bug is meaner, so it might still be a day or two.
June 02, 2008 - Pastamancers now have a much higher chance of getting their first quasi-ethereal macaroni fragments to drop in the Pantry.
June 02, 2008 - Fixed a bug in the combat action bar that made it impossible to change pages.
May 26, 2008 - That bug I said I fixed on the 24th? Well, today I ACTUALLY fixed it.
May 24, 2008 - Fixed a broken Hole in the Sky behavior for the Mayfly swarm.
May 02, 2008 - The acid-squirting flower and Psalm of Pointiness are no longer mutually exclusive. Also, the hippy protest button now actually does something.
April 22, 2008 - Divine champagne flutes are now usable items, which allows you to select which booze you drink with the flute. Also, divine champagne flutes are now in the Consumables / Miscellaneous section of your inventory.
April 21, 2008 - Your list of combat usable items should now properly change when you put items in or take items out of your display case.
April 21, 2008 - Skills which you have kept across ascensions, but can't use due to being in Hardcore or Bad Moon are now viewable via a link in the character sheet.
April 17, 2008 - I made a slight change to the way black picnic baskets work. There should no longer be especially long streaks with no black pepper.
April 15, 2008 - When you view a clan, people who are in Bad Moon now show "(BM)" rather than "(H)" next to them.
April 15, 2008 - Soft echo green eardrop whatevers will now appear in the list of MP restoring items list on the skills menu. Works with Quick Skills too!
April 15, 2008 - The iceberglet and its associated items now give a "squeeze again" link when you squeeze them. This is good for cases where you're in the mood for a whole lot of squeezing.
April 15, 2008 - Locked doors in the Daily Dungeon now tell you how many skeleton keys you have (if any).
April 15, 2008 - Metallic foil cat ears: You can has them.
April 15, 2008 - The summon button for the new Pastamancer stuff now tells you what kind of thing you're summoning, as well as what its name is.
April 10, 2008 - Accessories in your inventory are now always sorted by name, even if you've set equipment to sort by power.
April 01, 2008 - Fixed a bug that was causing some intrinsic effects to persist through ascension.
April 01, 2008 - To avoid (or possibly cause) confusion, the Tome of Transcendent Olfaction has been renamed to the Manual of Transcendent Olfaction.
March 31, 2008 - The rewards for retrieving Yossarian's tools are now zappable into one another.
March 31, 2008 - Various punctuation marks are now usable in candy hearts: , @ # $ ^ > * ' " = + - / \ & ( ) : ;
March 28, 2008 - Fixed a bug that was causing the item "brick of sand" to not stun monsters the way it used to.
March 25, 2008 - If you try to adventure in an area of the Cyrpt that has already been undefiled, you will now get a link back to the Cyrpt.
March 25, 2008 - There's now a little magnifying glass above your campsite dwelling that will tell you what bed you've got in your dwelling.
March 25, 2008 - The server should now remember when you've removed an item from the Combat Action Bar.
March 18, 2008 - You now get proper access to Hagnk's after freeing the King in a Bad Moon run.
March 18, 2008 - You can now forsake your period of Ronin and drop to a casual ascension with an option in the Account Menu.
March 18, 2008 - Fixed a minor glitch whereby certain conditional skills that were supposed to be free were charging 1 MP.
March 17, 2008 - Internet Explorer users of the Combat Action Bar should now be able to load the old combat form.
March 13, 2008 - The character pane should now update properly when you get Meat from the hippy store.
March 08, 2008 - Fixed a glitch with the Weapon link in last week's trivial inventory update.
March 06, 2008 - Rings of gain strength, adornment, and increase damage have all had their enchantments doubled.
March 05, 2008 - In inventory, the name of an equipment slot at the top is now a link to that section of the equipment page.
March 05, 2008 - The "From" display when you open gift packages is now a proper player link. This means you can now use the right-click menu, if you've got it enabled, to quickly send a thank-you note if you want to.
February 27, 2008 - There should now be an "Adventure again" link after you fight a topiary golem.
February 26, 2008 - The Flea Market now has sections for HP- and MP-restoring items.
February 26, 2008 - During the level 12 quest, the "Last Adventure" container link should now send you to the specific section of the island you were in, rather than the main island page. Sorry it took me so long to figure out that this is what people were asking for.
February 26, 2008 - At least two problems with the Yellow Exclamation Points sending you to the Council when they've got nothing for you have been solved. At least one problem with the previous sentence has been ignored.
February 26, 2008 - The various duckful zones of McMillicancuddy's farm should now have links back to the island when they become duckless.
February 25, 2008 - The various Pastamancer lo mein dishes no longer require the Wok of Ages to cook.
February 22, 2008 - Drum machines are now tradable, and they will no longer work if you haven't unlocked Desert Beach yet.
February 21, 2008 - Spectral Snapper is now no longer unusable with a ranged weapon equipped.
February 19, 2008 - The first encounter with Mr. Alarm should now properly respond to +Noncombat skills and effects.
February 18, 2008 - Divine champagne flutes should no longer trigger on the steel margarita. In other news, all trivial updates, starting with this one, will be written by Allen Ginsberg.
February 18, 2008 - The conditional that prevents the lion oil from dropping before the bird rib has been altered such that it now only applies during your very first run through the game.
February 18, 2008 - There's another new clover adventure, this one in the Black Forest.
February 18, 2008 - There's a new clover adventure at The Oasis.
February 18, 2008 - The drop rate on the quest items in The F'c'le have been increased a bit to bring them more in line with drop rates on other quest items in other zones and other, completely different video games.
February 11, 2008 - The Hole in the Sky no longer has two different (identical) versions of the Astronomer in it.
February 08, 2008 - There's a new item that can be made with mummy wrappings. Ashallond will presumably be super-excited.
February 08, 2008 - The NPZR will no longer steal Meat after the 10th round of combat. Nerf nerf nerf.
February 08, 2008 - Beanbag chairs have gotten the meat locker / evil golden arches treatment, which was the most popular program at John Harvey Kellogg's sanatorium. They now go INSIDE your dwelling, and give bonus MP when you rest.
February 07, 2008 - Small meat pasting change: Items which can be meat pasted are now marked as such on their item description, and only items which are meat pasting components will show up in the [combine stuff] page.
February 07, 2008 - Evil golden arches are also no longer campsite items.
February 07, 2008 - The Orcish Meat locker is no longer a campsite item. The locker item (and the key, and the way in which the "puzzle" works) has been updated.
February 07, 2008 - Fixed some display weirdness with the campground bookshelf.
February 02, 2008 - Golden Mr. Accessories should now be usable in Bad Moon (in the same, not-actually-impacting-gameplay way that they do in regular Hardcore.)
February 02, 2008 - the plastic pumpkin bucket should no longer behave incorrectly against physically resistant monsters (this fix will actually take effect at rollover tonight.)
February 02, 2008 - The name of your Reassembled Blackbird is now remembered across ascensions.
February 01, 2008 - There's no longer a stupid comma inside the stupid parentheses when you use a stupid Knob Goblin firecracker.
January 31, 2008 - There has been a slight change to the way White Citadel burgers work in Bad Moon. Propriety prohibits me from being any more specific.
January 30, 2008 - You can now get rid of the Degrassi Knoll shopping list by using it after you've already built your meatcar.
January 28, 2008 - In order to repair the damage from a short-sighted decision made earlier in the week, the pirate fledges are now a quest item.
January 23, 2008 - Zones or stores which can only be accessed by wearing the pirate outfit will now also be accessible by only wearing pirate fledges.
January 23, 2008 - The list of things you can turn in for coins during the level 12 quest is now alphabetized. I'm REALLY stretching the limits of "trivial" here.
January 23, 2008 - CLEESHing physically resistant monsters should no longer result in a physically-resistant amphibian.
January 23, 2008 - Cans of black paint should now be multi-usable.
January 23, 2008 - The MP regeneration from the spark-plug earring should be working now.
January 22, 2008 - Fixed the bug that was making the Protector Spectre not physically resistant.
January 21, 2008 - There's been a trivial change to the way sandcastles are constructed. No game reason, it just makes it easier for me to work with the campsite dwelling interface.
January 13, 2008 - Pieces of after eight should no longer cause you to explode... most of the time. Hee hee.
December 22, 2007 - A "view clan for selected player" function has been added to the right click menu. Enable this option in your Account Menu.
December 16, 2007 - Made an optimization change to the way your combat items are displayed during a fight, which ought to reduce lag a bit on inventory-related scripts. Please report any bugs you encounter.
December 12, 2007 - Items in restaurants such as Chez Snootée and the Gnomish Micromicrobrewery now have item descriptions, which can be read by clicking on the picture of the item.
December 10, 2007 - Items that do prismatic elemental damage (like the yohohoyo) should now properly Pulverize into elemental stuff.
December 10, 2007 - Made some changes to the way to-hit and damage work for Thrust Smack and Lunging Thrust Smack in concert with Eye of the Stoat. This should make it a little easier for high level Seal Clubbers to deal with scaling monsters, and help speed up combats a little for casual play.
December 07, 2007 - Jiggling a chefstaff no longer causes your familiar to eschew action for that round. Gezundheit.
December 05, 2007 - I had forgotten to change one of the drops on the old pirate's cove, so the whole charrrm bracelet system didn't make a whole lot of sense. Fixed now.
December 04, 2007 - Fixed a bug that caused the grumpy old man charrrm bracelet to be undisassemblable. Also a bug that caused the word "undisassemblable" to not actually be a word.
December 04, 2007 - Fixed an issue that allowed you to buy multiple dictionaries, and a typo that was causing one of the choice adventure outcomes on the F'c'le to give you the wrong stat.
December 04, 2007 - A glitch that was preventing people from getting the Open Seas adventure multiple times has been fixed. Sorry 'bout that.
December 03, 2007 - The ultrarare Talisman of Bakula is now 3 times as powerful as it used to be, but can only be used once per combat.
November 28, 2007 - Fixed some display weirdness in the fight code that would happen if you did multiple kinds of elemental damage but no physical damage. I'm not sure it ever actually came up, but it's still fixed.
October 30, 2007 - The Sauceror recipes for transmuting elemental wads have been altered in secret, mysterious ways.
October 28, 2007 - If you have autoattack on, it will no longer trigger during the Shadow fight.
October 25, 2007 - Viewing the players in a clan now gives you a readout of which of those players are online, and/or in chat.
October 25, 2007 - The jewel-eyed wizard hat now works its buff-duration-increasing magic from your inventory, and no longer needs to be equipped for that purpose.
October 23, 2007 - The "Frosty the Hitman" effect has been changed to be more in line with its description.
October 05, 2007 - You can now swap the location on the character pane of your effects and familiar using a new option in the Account Menu.
September 28, 2007 - The "zooming out of reach" message from the navel ring should stop displaying at inappropriate times.
September 25, 2007 - There's now a plaque in the Cannon Museum commemorating the reconstruction of Hagnk's. If you contributed bricks, they also now show up in the accomplishments section of your Quest Log.
September 18, 2007 - The Brimstone items are now animated. Go HotStuff!
September 05, 2007 - A whole slew of minor bugfixes today. See this post for specifics.
September 03, 2007 - A whole bunch of typos and (gasp!) grammatical mistakes were fixed.
September 03, 2007 - A bug that made the Brimstone Beret's enchantments not work properly was fixed.
September 03, 2007 - A bug causing Saucespheres to not deal damage to attacking foes has been fixed. This fix was executed and announced professionally and with no snarky comments whatsoever.
August 31, 2007 - The quality of the dusty bottles of wine from Spookyraven's Wine Cellar has been reduced significantly. On the bright side, everything else got much better in comparison!
August 20, 2007 - There's now an adventure in the Arid, Extra-Dry Desert (Unhydrated) that will give you a hippy outfit if you're stuck in the level 12 quest with no uniform.
August 13, 2007 - The Spanish Fly mini-quest should now be doable even after the level 12 quest is completed.
August 13, 2007 - You are now significantly less likely to get Teleportitis in the Enormous Greater-Than Sign before you get the plus sign.
August 13, 2007 - The drunkenness adventure at the Obligatory Pirate's Cove (In Disguise) is now significantly less RNG-swingy. A better, more content-rich approach to the whole deal is in the works.
August 13, 2007 - Casual ascensions are no longer counted on the "Most Normal Ascensions" leaderboard.
August 13, 2007 - Casual ascensions are now designated with beanbag chairs in the ascension history. (Thanks, Oxbarn!)
August 13, 2007 - Bad Moon leaderboards should start updating properly today.
August 09, 2007 - The "last adventure" stuff for the Wine Cellar and the Junkyard should be fixed again again. Again.
August 07, 2007 - Bad Moon leaderboards are now up.
August 07, 2007 - Turtle Tamer and Sauceror buffs will now properly be greyed out in Firefox if you do not have a totem or saucepan, respectively.
August 02, 2007 - All valentines in the Kingdom (with the exception of display case ones) have been nuked due to a bug which allowed people to purchase infinitely many of them at no cost.
August 01, 2007 - Pre-NS13 familiar percentage runs have been archived ala ascension runs, and any such run started before NS13 will no longer appear on current leaderboards (after rollover.)
August 01, 2007 - You can now properly receive a buff from the Mysterious Island Arena after winning the war for the frat boys.
July 30, 2007 - "Adventure again" links now function properly again for zones which contain subzones, such as the wine cellar.
July 29, 2007 - You can no longer make Wine Cellar monsters drop all the possible bottles of dusty wine via unscrupulous URL crafting.
July 29, 2007 - The war frat streaker now properly counts as a frat boy casualty.
July 28, 2007 - You can now have more than 11 custom outfits. 26 more. In a row.
July 27, 2007 - Using an elf farm raffle ticket in a Bad Moon ascension will no longer mark you ineligible for a subsequent Bad Moon ascension.
July 26, 2007 - Chefstaves can no longer be equipped in your off-hand, you dirty exploiters.
July 20, 2007 - The feedback from shrugging a buff (via right click on the character pane) should now load inline on whatever page you're on (like quick skills) if you are using a recent version of IE or Firefox (parenthetical statement!)
July 18, 2007 - There is now a link to the terrarium on the character pane when you do not have a familiar out. (*huff, puff*)
July 18, 2007 - Food, booze, and spleen items in your inventory will now be strikethrough'd and grayed if you do not meet the level requirements for consumption.
July 18, 2007 - The option that separated ranged and melee weapons will now separate ranged, melee, and mysticality weapons into their own containers on the inventory page.
July 18, 2007 - The hedge maze puzzle now indicates in its alt text which tiles are the exit and entrance tiles.
July 16, 2007 - Fixed a bug whereby Farmer McMillicancuddy would change allegiance (offering his services to not the highest, but the most recent bidder.)
July 16, 2007 - Familiars equipped with the Plastic Pumpkin Bucket should no longer pick physical attacks against physically-resistant monsters that aren't elementally aligned. This update is complicated.
July 16, 2007 - The "Last Adventure" container document link now goes to the right place for Fernswarthy's Basement.
July 16, 2007 - Mojo filters are now multi-usable.
July 10, 2007 - A bunch of little things got fixed/updated today. See this post for details.
July 10, 2007 - The Seal Clubber self-buff Snarl of the Timberwolf now lasts for 10 turns per cast instead of 5.
July 10, 2007 - Fixed a bug where some people were not properly getting credit for using a certain item to get a certain trophy. Specific!
July 09, 2007 - Thrust Smack and Lunging Thrust Smack no longer cancel the effects of Entangling Noodles. Unnerfed!
July 07, 2007 - Black bottle rockets weren't working the way they were supposed to. Now they are.
July 04, 2007 - Fixed the bug where your guild leader would not recognize that you had completed your epic weapon. If this is still happening to you, log out and back in and try again.
July 01, 2007 - The bug that caused palm fronds to be consumed when used one at a time has been fixed.
June 30, 2007 - The Hippy Camp and Orcish Frat Houses now properly display the (1) after completion of the level 12 quest.
June 30, 2007 - Fixed a bug where a lower-quality accordion was trumping a higher-quality one when buffs were being cast.
June 27, 2007 - The bug where you couldn't perm a skill going into a Casual run has been fixed.
June 27, 2007 - Digital keys and Richard's star keys are now cookable into pies the way the Legend keys are. Thanks to Dr_Van_van_Mojo for suggesting this.
June 25, 2007 - The issues with Teleportitis sending you to zones you shouldn't be able to get to yet have been fixed. Mostly. I think.
June 25, 2007 - A text version of a very graphically intensive item central to the level 11 quest has been added, for those who are visually impaired, or just couldn't make any sense of it due to the small handwriting.
June 24, 2007 - NS13 was implemented.
June 21, 2007 - Opera masks should no longer cause you to cast zero turns of an Accordion Thief buff.
June 07, 2007 - You can now suppress the function of someone else's sword behind inappropriate prepositions in chat by using a WANG on them.
June 07, 2007 - The "Red Neck" intrinsic of the mesh cap has been changed a bit. Expect various other minor equipment tweaks over the next day or two.
June 06, 2007 - One of the items that was supposed to be dropping in the Rogue Windmill wasn't actually dropping. Now it is. Thanks, Ricket!
June 06, 2007 - The Knight in White Satin is no longer holding his sword by the blade. He feels much better now.
June 06, 2007 - The ram-battering staff and the icy-hot katana are now smithing recipes, rather than meat paste recipes.
June 04, 2007 - The image for the bellhop bell is now the right kind of bell. Sorry about that.
June 04, 2007 - The bug whereby the not-a-pipe gave you Muscle three times in a row instead of some of each stat has been fixed.
May 29, 2007 - Turtleslinger is now one-handed.
April 29, 2007 - The "you didn't properly log out" thing should happen a lot less often now.
April 10, 2007 - Plural monsters should no longer screw up the grammar on skill usage or plastic pumpkin buckets.
March 30, 2007 - It is now no longer possible to waste MP by casting Cannelloni Cocoon more than once.
March 30, 2007 - You can now quickly select people on your contact list when using items on other players (e.g.: bricks, candy hearts, toilet paper.)
March 29, 2007 - If you use the super-secret undocumented stealth login feature, your logout messages will also be suppressed when you use the "log out" link.
March 28, 2007 - Barrrnacles now suck twice as hard as they used to.
March 18, 2007 - You can now search for players who are specifically NOT in hardcore using the search players box.
March 17, 2007 - A PvP mailbox has been added to the messages screen. All PvP related messages will now be unceremoniously dumped therein.
March 15, 2007 - The bug wherein Pickpocket as an autoattack was failing when you were out of MP has been fixed.
March 14, 2007 - Moxie classes can now choose Pickpocket as an autoattack option in the Account Menu. Kleptomaniacs rejoice!
March 13, 2007 - The clan detailed roster page now has ascension and PvP information on it.
March 12, 2007 - All of the grammatical weirdness associated with using combat items against plural enemies should now be fixed. We appreciates your bug reports if we missed any.
February 27, 2007 - Anti-anti-antidotes are now usable in combat. This change foreshadows absolutely nothing.
February 24, 2007 - Reports generated by clan warfare attacks no longer clutter up the clan message board, but, instead, have been moved to a separate section, accessible from the clan war room page.
February 19, 2007 - Titanium assault umbrellas now give slight resistance to all elements, instead of just spooky and sleaze.
February 18, 2007 - You can now use the right click menu to send a candy heart (color chosen randomly, due to space concerns.) Go to the Account Menu to enable this option. Additionally, you can no longer use items on other players while you are banned.
February 18, 2007 - You can now choose different items to use on other people directly from the "Use Items On Other People" page (like, the one you get when you send candy hearts, throw bricks, etc.)
February 17, 2007 - Thrust Smack and Lunging Thrust Smack will now cause monsters to break free from Entangling Noodles.
February 11, 2007 - Candygrams are now usable in quantity.
February 11, 2007 - The chat notification one receives upon reception of a candy heart has received a link which will receive take you to your inbox, so you can look at it.
February 07, 2007 - Hippy Stones now automatically repair themselves once their owners have been inactive for two weeks.
February 06, 2007 - All of the tracking bugs with Doppelshifters and Comma Chameleons should be fixed now.
February 03, 2007 - Candy Hearts can now be sent (as box-of-sunshine-style gift packages) to players in Ronin and Hardcore.
January 24, 2007 - There is now an option in the Account Menu (under Inventory Options) to hide all sections in your inventory by default.
January 24, 2007 - Sending private messages using the right click menu should now prevent chat from timing out.
January 15, 2007 - There is now an option in the Account Menu which will put HP restoring items in the dropdown on the skills page and the quick skills dialog, for those of you who are inclined to want them there.
January 15, 2007 - Fixed a glitch with the tropical paperweight and deck of cards.
December 29, 2006 - You can now change the order in which your trophies are displayed.
December 29, 2006 - A clover adventure has been added (sort of at the last minute) to the Crimborg Collective Factory.
December 23, 2006 - Starting tomorrow, the tiny plastic skeletal reindeer will properly give an adventure at rollover.
December 22, 2006 - 31337 scrolls are now usable in quantity. Happy Festivus.
December 18, 2006 - The way the stat day calculation works has been changed slightly. It no longer always rounds up. There is no longer any advantage to using 200 Meat at a time in the Hall of Legends, so please stop doing that.
December 18, 2006 - Most familiar actions during fights are now accompanied by a little picture of the familiar.
December 15, 2006 - Player names in clan log entries will be, from this point forward, links to the player's profile.
November 30, 2006 - Heart necklaces are now a free pull from Hagnk's.
November 26, 2006 - Backslashes now work in chat.
November 18, 2006 - Random interface upgrade: A small timer will now appear on the left side of the screen when it is less than 30 minutes 'til rollover.
November 18, 2006 - Numbered ascension tattoos should now be ordered correctly on the Manage Tattoos page.
November 17, 2006 - A bug that allowed clan leaders to boot themselves from their clan has been slain.
November 16, 2006 - There is a new inventory option which allows you to unequip your familiar equipment when you click [unequip all] on the inventory page.
November 16, 2006 - There is now an option in the Account Menu to show the name of your currently equipped outfit on the left pane. (This feature does not work in compact mode.)
November 14, 2006 - The problem with clan whitelist ranks and titles mysteriously disappearing should now be fixed.
November 13, 2006 - In Mall stores, there's now a link back to your search results at the top of the page, as well as the bottom. Whee!
November 11, 2006 - The right-click menu now has toilet paper and cream pie options. (Enable them in the account menu.)
November 09, 2006 - The Crackpot Mystic, for undisclosed reasons, has disassembled his shack and reassembled it in the Distant Woods.
November 02, 2006 - Hero of the Half Shell is now actually "fixed." Thanks to Kaaewen for figuring out that it was still "broken."
November 01, 2006 - The ascension history report has been gussied up a bit, and now includes "favorite familiar" data for the runs that have it.
November 01, 2006 - There's now an option lurking in the Account menu to hide the clan calendar on the right side of the screen
October 31, 2006 - I can no longer take the pressure. I have snapped. Hero of the Half Shell has been "fixed" -- check the skill description for details.
October 31, 2006 - Fixed a glitch that was causing some Mac browsers to hang for a long time after sending a k-mail. Also, posted one of the most boring and businesslike trivial updates ever.
October 28, 2006 - New undocumented feature: you can now right-click (in most browsers) on the picture of an effect from a buff to shrug it off.
October 24, 2006 - A new hilarious item approaches!
October 21, 2006 - Clan leaders can now set a clan website using the Clan Administration link. A link to this website shows up in your clan's public profile page.
October 19, 2006 - Clan leaders can now prevent other players from applying to their clans with a button on the clan admin page. (Players who are whitelisted to clans which are denying applications can still get in.)
October 18, 2006 - There were some inaccuracies in the descriptions of some of the pieces of clan furniture (the Meat-giving ones.) These inaccuracies have been accurated.
October 10, 2006 - The ascension history page now shows lifetime hardcore stats and PvP ranking. Also, the total lifetime stats only update daily, so that every other person in the game doesn't use them to tell when you're shoring.
October 02, 2006 - The number of login failures allowed has been increased from three to five.
September 29, 2006 - Magnifying glass invasion! Magnifying glasses (which allow you to view item descriptions) have been added to lots of different forms, including the closet, manage mall store, and gift interfaces.
September 27, 2006 - You can no longer load other pages while in the middle of a choice adventure.
September 25, 2006 - Plus elemental spell damage equipment now properly doubles its bonus damage against monsters of the appropriate elements.
September 21, 2006 - The two buffs that weren't shruggable are now shruggable. (This is probably the only setting where "shruggable" is a valid adjective.)
September 20, 2006 - The /mark chat command now outputs a timestamp when used. (If you are in chat right now, you'll have to /exit and come back in to be able to use the new feature.)
September 06, 2006 - The adventure and monster queues are now 5 units long rather than 3. If you don't know what this means, don't worry about it... :)
September 02, 2006 - Comma Chameleons who are currently mimicking Spirit Hoboes can now consume booze.
August 30, 2006 - There was a problem with the monster crit/fumble code that was making it happen too often. Each should now happen a little more than half as often as it was for the last day.
August 27, 2006 - The bugs with the HP and MP minigames in PvP should be fixed now. Also, the familiar minigame now uses current weight rather than kills to determine the winner. Ties are resolved by kills.
August 16, 2006 - A bunch of new utensils have been added as monster drops at various levels. A handful of utensil smithing recipes have also gone in.
August 08, 2006 - Items in NPC stores with the same price are now sorted by name, and should stop randomly changing order.
July 25, 2006 - The PvP rank bug should be fixed now. Sorry 'bout that.
July 23, 2006 - Minor interface tweak: Equipping a two handed ranged weapon over 2 one-handed melee weapons no longer fails.
July 18, 2006 - The Toot Oriole and the first run of the Gourd quest are now tracked in the Quest Log.
July 16, 2006 - Accessory slots in your inventory's equip page are now numbered if you have individual accessory slot equip links turned on.
July 13, 2006 - There has been an addition to the policies.
July 11, 2006 - Damage done to you in the Daily Dungeon is now elementalized, where appropriate.
July 10, 2006 - The goofiness with homeopathic healing powder and multiuse of spleen items has been smoothed out.
July 06, 2006 - Knob Goblin seltzer is now sold in the Knob Goblin Lab Store.
July 05, 2006 - Mimics encountered in the Barrel Full of Barrels, if defeated, will now drop the item that you would have gotten if you hadn't found a mimic in that barrel.
June 30, 2006 - The plexiglass pith helmet has been changed to regenerate more HP and MP than it did before.
June 24, 2006 - Mall store purchase log entries generated past the time of this announcement should now be more accurate.
June 19, 2006 - You must now keep your plexiglass pendant equipped to have four songs in your head. (Taking it off removes the song with the least turns left.) (Nerf nerf nerf.)
June 19, 2006 - The Flea Market has been the target of some random interface polishing.
June 17, 2006 - The raffle house should start giving out second prizes again. For the next two days, six second-place prizes will be awarded to make up for lost time.
June 15, 2006 - The skills page now grays/hides Accordion Thief skills if you lack an accordion.
June 12, 2006 - Golden Mr. Accessories can now smile on people who are in combat.
June 09, 2006 - Minor issues related to stat gains at low levels (-1 in level progress bar, erroneous "gain some Levels" message) have been fixed.
June 07, 2006 - There is now a readout on the inventory page that shows whether a weapon is one- or two-handed.
June 07, 2006 - Quest items can no longer be put into your closet. All closeted quest items have been returned to inventory.
June 06, 2006 - Additionally, level requirements for joining and creating clans are also waived if you have ascended at least once.
June 06, 2006 - The level requirements for the Mall are now waived if you have ascended at least once.
June 05, 2006 - You can now view item descriptions for things in your clan stash via the handy, dandy Magnifying Glass picture.
June 05, 2006 - You can now access the Knob Goblin Lab Store using the last adventure link.
June 04, 2006 - There is now a readout on the Accomplishments section of the Quest Log showing how many adventures you have spent stargazing.
June 03, 2006 - If you fail to kill a certain wand-bearing mimic, you now have the chance to encounter him again after a rollover.
June 02, 2006 - Golden Mr. Accessories now give boxes of sunshine to whomever you have smiled on if they have ascended at least once, rather than if they are in Ronin or Hardcore.
June 02, 2006 - The "total profit" readout on the mall store log has been fixed.
May 28, 2006 - Acoustic and heavy metal thundarrr guitars are now ranged weapons.
May 27, 2006 - The meatcar quest has been altered slightly -- it is now impossible to go to Desert Beach unless your guild has unlocked it for you.
May 27, 2006 - KMail timestamps now include the year during which you received a given KMail.
May 25, 2006 - There was a bug with the way shield damage reduction was being calculated, and it has been fixed. All +absorption enchantments have also been removed from shields. The net effect of this change is probably pretty close to zero.
May 19, 2006 - The doppelshifter character pane picture bug is now fixed.
May 15, 2006 - The new Ode to Booze formula now applies to things the Spirit Hobo drinks.
May 13, 2006 - Another fluctuation in the primal force of hilarity has allowed another item to be summoned from the Grimoire.
May 12, 2006 - The oft-reported-as-misspelled "Examigne Items In Storage" button in Hagnk's has been replaced with a magnifying glass. A magnifying glass... OF DOOM.
May 10, 2006 - There are now two new cookbooks for sale in the League of the Chef-Magi guild store.
May 07, 2006 - The bug wherein purple snowcones weren't regenerating some of their MP if you used a skill to kill a monster is fixed.
May 05, 2006 - More gift package genocide: plain brown wrappers with only 1 Meat have been deleted. Additionally, plain brown wrappers now cost 50 Meat.

An artifact of the culling process made all your plain brown wrappers move to your inventory.
May 04, 2006 - You can now click on names in your consumption records and view an item description. (This doesn't work for things from the brewery or Chez Snootee.)
May 03, 2006 - Due to egregious abuse of free gift boxes, all black velvet boxes with only 1 meat in them were destroyed. Everyone else, check your inventory for lost packages.
May 03, 2006 - Switching between compact mode and full mode no longer requires the page refresh that kills chat.
April 29, 2006 - KWE fight transcripts are available in the fact book in John Wilke's Booth.
April 27, 2006 - You can now remove multiple entries at once from your contact and ignore lists using the "Manage your contact/ignore lists" link in the account menu. Additionally, these lists are now compatible with the right-click menu.
April 27, 2006 - The >> player link syntax also now works in KMail. Now, can we please be a little more mature about the new feature than we were when it first rolled out?
April 24, 2006 - Another another new chat feature -- you can use /clear (or /cls, for you old-school QBASIC programmers) to clear your chat pane.
April 24, 2006 - Another new chat feature -- you can force [channel] tags to appear for the channel you're in. Turn it on in the account menu.
April 23, 2006 - New chat feature -- you can make links to other players by typing >> and a playerid, like so: >>46205.
April 20, 2006 - Lifetime stats are now visible on the ascension history page.
April 19, 2006 - The clan recruiter now allows you to search clan credos as well as names. Also, line breaks are preserved in credos when other people view them now. Sorry that took so long to fix.
April 19, 2006 - You will no longer see PvP win/lose messages from people on your ignore list.
April 15, 2006 - You can now collapse sections when viewing display cases by clicking on the shelf name. (No memory functionality is planned for this feature.)
April 15, 2006 - Due to fluctuations in the primal forces of hilarity, three new items can now be created from McPhee's Grimoire.
April 15, 2006 - The flaming crutch is now a weapon.
April 08, 2006 - The Hall of Legends has been changed to use a better random distribution method. (So stop donating the minimum amount over and over.)
April 07, 2006 - You can now use the /notes command in chat to add a line to the bottom of your quest log notes page.
April 07, 2006 - The quest log will now remember which page you last visited (but not across logins.)
April 04, 2006 - The Cake-Shaped Arena will now tell you how many wins you need for a prize when you first enter it.
March 27, 2006 - Some items were added to the Knob Goblin Lab store.
March 23, 2006 - You can now set the color of your clan members' names in chat in the account menu. (Note that your contact list color overrides this choice.)
March 22, 2006 - The clan log has been changed. Of particular interest is the fact that clan stash transactions now occur towards the bottom of the page. (So stop reporting it as a bug.)
March 20, 2006 - The tradable dictionary has had its name changed to "facsimile dictionary" to disambiguate it from the dictionary quest item.
March 19, 2006 - Combat will now remember both of the combat items you use during combat between fights. (You'll have to relogin to make it work, though.)
March 16, 2006 - Hot on the heels of /clannies, there is now an account setting which allows you to get notifications when your clan members log in.
March 16, 2006 - There is a new chat command, /clannies , which shows all the online members in your clan. Now only if I could think of a better name for the command.
March 06, 2006 - The new Accordion Thief songs now count properly towards one's three song limit.
March 05, 2006 - The Armory and Leggery, in an impressive show of mercantile fortitude, has come to acquire all of the equipment that used to be sold by the Demon Market.
March 03, 2006 - You now have the ability to remove buff effects from yourself (for free) in your Character screen. In the Effects list, each buff will have a [shrug off] link next to it.
March 02, 2006 - A fountain was erected in Market Square. A superfluous fountain.
February 26, 2006 - The headbutt bug is fixed.
February 26, 2006 - No, seriously, this time -- the Hall of Records are updating again. Greasy little weasel...
February 24, 2006 - Familiars can now inflict elemental damage.
February 23, 2006 - The Hall of Records is now updating again. Whee.
February 21, 2006 - The game will now tell you when you have gained a level as a result of stat gains.
February 21, 2006 - Tomes of snowcone summoning now mark you no-delete. Those of you who had used one before and weren't no-delete are now.
February 14, 2006 - The PvP page now remembers what you are PvPing for. For what you are PvPing. (Rank, flowers, etc.)
February 13, 2006 - There is no longer a notification when (or if) you find everything in the Strange Leaflet. (This is on purpose.) Also, the "GO" command works again in the leaflet.
February 10, 2006 - The bug wherein the Pretentious Artist would not give you tattoos for outfits with offhand items has been fixed.
February 09, 2006 - The quest log's note section now has an option to change its font from variable-space to monospace and back.
February 09, 2006 - The clan credo change bug has been fixed.
February 06, 2006 - The clan calendar bug has been fixed. If yours is still broken, log out and log back in, and it should work.
February 06, 2006 - The star portion of the Perplexing Door quest has been changed. If you wish to preserve the integrity of your speed run, you'll probably want to do some research before you make any star items.
February 01, 2006 - The autosale interface has been changed to a checkbox-driven interface. (If you liked the old one, you can use your account menu to get it back.)
January 27, 2006 - The bang potion that didn't do anything now does something. Something minor, but something.
January 27, 2006 - The account menu is now divided up into four logical sections.
January 26, 2006 - All of the (currently known) familiars are now eligible to be chosen for individual familiar leaderboards.
January 25, 2006 - The skill page now remembers which MP restorer you've used (but not across logins.)
January 19, 2006 - Clan war rooms now order their list of clans to attack by number of goodies, then alphabetically.
January 19, 2006 - The mushroom plot has been given an interfacelift.
January 18, 2006 - Slight change to the inventory page -- items which you cannot equip are grayed out and strikethrough'd, to indicate that you can't use them yet.
January 17, 2006 - The right-click menu can now display a "View Ascension History" link.
January 17, 2006 - Yet another ascension records improvement -- the # column for ascensions after the time catastrophe is now accurate.
January 15, 2006 - There is now a message explaining the loss of ascension records in one's ascension history page if you lost records in the Great Time Catastrophe.
January 15, 2006 - The right click menu feature has been extended to work in several non-chat places (Hall of Records, KMail, bet archive, clan rosters.)
January 14, 2006 - Knob Goblin steroids, love potions, and a bunch of other candy items are now usable in quantity.
January 12, 2006 - There is now a "(Mostly) Potions" category in the miscellaneous section of your inventory which contains, as you might have guessed, (mostly) potions.
January 12, 2006 - O Frabjulous Day
The Haiku Challenge is now
January 12, 2006 - The queues that prevent you from seeing the same monsters and adventures have been altered such that logging back in does not clear them (so stop doing that.)
January 09, 2006 - The shelf limit in display cases has been raised from 11 to 37.
January 07, 2006 - The bug wherein newly ascended players were being denied their pulls and daily summons has been fixed. To correct this problem (if it happened to you,) simply log out and log back in.
January 06, 2006 - The snowcone skill no longer shows up on your list of skills to keep through ascension. (The skill is automatically made hardcore permanent when you use the tome.)
January 06, 2006 - Some of the familiars introduced during Crimbo now have familiar equipment. Now with recycled artwork action!
January 02, 2006 - The bug wherein your hardcore and path settings weren't being cleared after freeing the king has been fixed. If this affected you, please just ascend as normal, and do what you have to do at the end of the next run.
December 30, 2005 - Stat gains from most booze items have been doubled.
December 29, 2005 - A rather insidious bug related to being unable to log in if your password had a single quote in it has been fixed.
December 28, 2005 - The MMG's bet archive now only shows the last two weeks' worth of bets and an overall grand total instead of the choking morass that was every bet you ever made.
December 28, 2005 - The bug related to buying mall stores is fixed.
December 21, 2005 - Offhand item bugs (ascending, player profiles, item descriptions) go squash. *squash*
December 17, 2005 - Kmails now expire after 2 weeks instead of 1 week.
December 09, 2005 - The MMG now lists the last 20 bets made. Also, when someone takes your bet, the event notification is clickable, to take you back to the MMG.
December 02, 2005 - The mysterious disappearing messages problem has been eliminated. Send gifts without fear!
November 30, 2005 - A monster's HP now increases, in addition to its power and defense, if its level is increased by any means.
November 29, 2005 - Rolled-up inventory sections are now preserved for the duration of your session.
November 28, 2005 - The clan roster page is now paginated.
November 28, 2005 - Rat whiskers now have a purpose. Sort of.
November 26, 2005 - The Hall of Records now contains accurate totals for most normal ascensions and most hardcore ascensions.
November 26, 2005 - The message screen should now display the messages per page control even if you only have one page.
November 20, 2005 - All of the little goofs introduced from the new optimization tricks (missing ice-cold beer, last combat item unselected) have been fixed.
November 14, 2005 - You can now add more than one item at a time to your clan stash. Thanks, Xenophobe!
November 14, 2005 - Some of the starting items (seal tooth, scroll of turtle summoning, spices, and disco ball) have had their purposes changed in a very minor way.
November 08, 2005 - The "+PvP fights at rollover" effect of the Plexiglass Pike Pike should be working now.
November 04, 2005 - You can now equip and unequip familiar equipment from the Terrarium page.
November 01, 2005 - The manage tattoo page (on the account menu) will now attempt to replace any ascension-related tattoos you may have lost.
October 25, 2005 - You can now /friend and /baleet people by playerid as well as name.
October 25, 2005 - Item selections are now preserved from combat to combat.
October 25, 2005 - The "combine stuff" link now appears whether you've got meat paste in inventory or not.
October 21, 2005 - All of the typos from the Kingdom Gameplay typo thread have been corrected. The typo in tihs announcement has not.
October 19, 2005 - Doc Galaktik's Medicine Show has been modified somewhat.
October 17, 2005 - The once-and-future fez of etymology is once again craftable. The Baron quest's reward has changed slightly to make this possible.
October 15, 2005 - The "Manage Store" interface has been improved. Multiple items can now be put in store stocks at the same time.
October 15, 2005 - Items at the maximum Mall price (999,999,999 Meat) no longer show up in mall searches.
September 30, 2005 - All of the stuff I put on my to-do list during last night's show is done.
September 30, 2005 - Trivial updates now announce themselves in chat when I post them.
September 19, 2005 - You can now edit the names of all of your familiars at once.
September 19, 2005 - The Tr4pz0r will now trade furs in quantity.
September 18, 2005 - Gnorman can now Supertinker things in quantity. No more carpal tugnnel sygndrome for you!
September 18, 2005 - Xeno added a progress bar for familiar weight. Check it out in your account menu, which should also now be error-free in Safari.
September 16, 2005 - Doing a /whois in chat now tells you what channels somebody is listening to as well as what channel they're in.
September 13, 2005 - The words "Last Adventure" now link to the container document of your last adventure.
September 13, 2005 - Multiuse on all items now generates the same distribution as using the item one at a time.
September 07, 2005 - Items in the Untinker's list are now arranged alphabetically.
September 05, 2005 - There's a new item for sale at The Meatsmith.
September 04, 2005 - The Account menu script has been updated, and a cool new stat progress bar feature has been added. Yay, Xenophobe!
August 24, 2005 - Blood of the Wereseal now lasts 10 turns per vial instead of 5.
August 19, 2005 - A new adventure was added to the Dungeons of Doom.
August 14, 2005 - The documentation has been beefed up a bit by Mr. Skullhead. Of particular note is the newly-added guide to common scams.
August 12, 2005 - The length of the Ronin period has been reduced again, this time to 600 Adventures.
August 11, 2005 - Familiar weight and kills are no longer visible when you look at another player's profile.
August 11, 2005 - All stringed instruments are now created equal.
August 11, 2005 - All leftover quest items have been nuked from clan stashes, due to some weird quest flag problems they were causing for some people.
July 23, 2005 - By popular demand, SGEEAs have been moved to the consumables page of the inventory.
July 20, 2005 - Xenophobe put together some slick image maps for the Sorceress' Lair -- you can now jump to individual parts of the tower from the page linked to from the main map.
July 19, 2005 - Gift packages now have their own subsection in the miscellaneous section of the inventory.
July 14, 2005 - You can now make meat paste from the combine screen if you run out.
July 11, 2005 - The Consumables pane of the inventory now arranges itself according to your Path. If you have one.
July 11, 2005 - Your name is now clickable on your Character Sheet, and links to your public profile.
July 10, 2005 - You can now specify a chat color for people who are NOT on your contact list.
July 10, 2005 - A new chat channel (/hardcore) has been added for people who have completed at least one hardcore ascension.
July 09, 2005 - Your Mind Control Device setting now shows up in your character pane.
July 06, 2005 - I made a change to Hagnk's that should make it load considerably faster.
July 06, 2005 - The chat input box now gets bigger when you resize the pane.
July 05, 2005 - Innabox now properly fails to smith ALL class-specific recipes.
July 05, 2005 - The gnauga hide chaps now require Advanced Armorcrafting (or whatever that skill is called) to make.
July 05, 2005 - If you normally save outgoing messages, Gift Shop messages will now be saved in your Outbox. Also, line breaks are now preserved in the outside messages on gifts.
July 04, 2005 - I made some cosmetic changes to the trade system, which ought to make things a little less confusing.
July 02, 2005 - The maypole now has familiar-specific messages.
June 28, 2005 - Stuff in stores owned by disabled players no longer shows up in mall searches.
June 28, 2005 - The henna tattoo's effect has been changed to a flat Mysticality increase. Something will appear soon that provides the functionality they used to have.
June 28, 2005 - A few minor changes. Familiars in your terrarium are now listed in order of kills (descending.) The last adventure link in compact mode now has meaningful ALT text. The "Manage Outfits" interface now shows the contents of your custom outfits.
June 28, 2005 - The way days are counted on ascension runs has been fixed. The existing records have been updated accordingly.
June 19, 2005 - A couple of the post-ascension skills have had their effectivegness igncreased.
June 19, 2005 - The MicroMechaMech familiar is now working as it should, instead of failing to not work as it shouldn't.
June 19, 2005 - The Council should now automatically update your top menu pane when they open up a new area to you.
June 19, 2005 - The Crackpot Mystic can now make items in quantity.
June 18, 2005 - The Ascendingest Clans board now shows average # of ascensions to two decimal places.
June 08, 2005 - Ascension was implemented.
June 08, 2005 - Some changes have been made to the way certain combat items work. (All of the changes make them MORE effective, not less.) Also, procrastination potions are now usable in combat.
June 08, 2005 - The Flea Market has been slightly altered. On the screen where you sell stuff, it'll now show you what things you're selling, and allow you to pull items out.
June 05, 2005 - There have been some minor changes to the levels at which zones open up, and to monster levels and rewards. The only really noticable one is Whitey's Grove, which has been made considerably harder and had its stat rewards increased a lot.
June 04, 2005 - Some of the outlying cocktails (the ones that don't fit into the neat, balanced, symmetrical system we put in place a while ago) have had their stat gains increased. Bloody Mary stat gains went down a little.
June 03, 2005 - Some food changes (almost all improvements) have been made, and several new recipes have been added. Nothing terribly exciting, just balancing out some early game stuff.
June 03, 2005 - Some combat changes -- the stats you gain from monsters now tend towards 50% primary, 25%/25% secondary. Ranged damage has been increased, unarmed damage has been decreased.
June 01, 2005 - Magical Mystery Juices now cost 100 Meat instead of 150.
June 01, 2005 - There's now an option in the account menu to prevent people from looking into your terrarium.
June 01, 2005 - (Nerf nerf nerf.)
June 01, 2005 - Minor skill changes: Saucy Salve is no longer usable outside of combat, and Lasagna Bandages now costs 6MP instead of 5, and is usable both in and out of combat.
May 31, 2005 - Moxious Manuever has been changed -- its MP cost is now equal to your level.
May 26, 2005 - The shout filter has been disabled in /clan.
May 25, 2005 - You can now click on the "Favorite Food" or "Favorite Booze" links in your profile to see a history of everything you've eaten and drunk since I started keeping track of consumption.
May 25, 2005 - The Distant Woods have been expanded a little bit due to a massive reforestation project on the part of the, umm, Citizens For Making Room For Things, Loathing Local #151.
May 24, 2005 - Some adventures have been added to Itznotyerzitz Mine (not in disguise.)
May 22, 2005 - The interface for making meat paste and stacks has been improved. Or, y'know, changed, at least.
May 17, 2005 - Quotes in your profile can now be up to 500 characters long.
May 16, 2005 - Pixel potions are slightly more effective now.
May 15, 2005 - I added a link to the "manage your collection" page that lets you view it the way other people see it.
May 10, 2005 - Replies to chat PMs should no longer accidentally go to somebody on your baleet list if he/she is the last person that tried to message you.
May 09, 2005 - The Sugar Rush effect is now working as intended. It was previously working as unintended.
May 06, 2005 - Having a pagoda at your campsite will now give you 3 extra Adventures per day. Yay, Pagoda!
May 06, 2005 - The damage done by the elemental rooms in the Daily Dungeon is now calculated correctly. It was calculated incorrectly before. In case you were wondering.
May 06, 2005 - The Meat drop bonus on the Incredibly Dense Meat Gem was raised to 25.
May 06, 2005 - The Knob sausage and bat-wing stir-fry recipes have been altered. Their base stir-fry ingredients have been switched.
May 02, 2005 - Fixed a problem with the Tam O' Shanter that made its bonus multiply with familiar bonuses instead of adding. Sorry, but this means less Meat at the high end...
May 02, 2005 - The levels of most of the monsters in the Palindome have been increased. Since the Pirates changed, they were too easy for the point at which the zone opens up.
May 02, 2005 - The Dwarves in Itznotyerzitz Mine now drop Meat.
May 02, 2005 - Spiky Hair has been fixed. Instead of doing nothing, it now does something. Something!
May 01, 2005 - Some adventures have been added to the eXtreme slope.
May 01, 2005 - Skill training costs have been changed. Now, cost = level * 1000. This is much better than the old system, in which cost = [number I pulled out of my ass].
May 01, 2005 - The Orcish Frat Boys and the constellations in the HitS have been given initiative values. They were accidentally all set to zero before.
April 30, 2005 - The drop bonus from Mr. Accessories Jr. has been upped from 10% to 25%.
April 29, 2005 - Lihc eye pies have been altered. They now give you an effect that grants spooky protection for 3 turns. Or perhaps 5. I forget.
April 26, 2005 - You can now store up to 20 chat macros.
April 23, 2005 - I made a slight cosmetic change to the way Meat shows up in trade offers, in response to a dumb new scam technique.
April 23, 2005 - I've set up a new system for trivial updates, which will make it easier to add and keep track of... er... trivial updates.
April 23, 2005 - An [unequip all] option has been added to the equipment pane of the inventory screen.
April 23, 2005 - Some adventures have been added to the Cobb's Knob Harem.
April 23, 2005 - The Crackpot Mystic can now make a white pixel out of a red pixel, a green pixel, and a blue pixel.

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